Originally From NY

Craftsman Daughter

2011-12-17T15:31:00.000-08:00

I've always been in and out of touch with my father's main pieces; his necklaces. He has been good with his hands since I can remember. There was always some new art he had to share with us. Constant inspiration. He bled art. He's greatly known for his beautiful, classic neck pieces that I've had a hate/love relationship for. I subconsciously hated them because they were so obviously ahead of my time. Even when I pulled them out on special occasions I still felt as if I were wearing my mother's teenage clothing that didn't fit right. These gorgeous family jewels were constantly praised around me. But because of their advancement I couldn't participate with the cheers.

Being that my father made them with his sweat,blood, and tears. They were his prized possessions, his beginning and end of life. Just as he claimed and expressed we were;his family. Maybe I felt like I was competing with them, like a little girl envy. I hated to love them but I wanted to be just like them.

Today, as I make my own necklaces and other beaded jewelry. I can only think of his own which for me is the top notch for elegance. I couldn't deny their beauty then but as I create my own I get to appreciate more and more where it stems from. So now when I have my sessions and I'm in the zone I use them as my personal template for whats perfect. Myself included when I look into the mirror.

It's amazing what a little bead can do.

I find myself thinking of ways to bring them upfront and to the limelight because of their authenticity. The craftsmanship and aesthetic is undeniable. I now use these gems as an every day "pick me up" to be as beautiful as I can allow myself to feel. Its a relief to be able to depend on something that I don't have to wait to speak. I just get it a glance on my neck and the ripple begins.

Propaganda at its Finest!

2011-11-22T10:30:00.000-08:00

This video set a fire inside of me that I could not put out. We do not have to search for these messages and hidden agendas when they are thrown in our faces.

I cursed my mother the other day by forcing her to watch "Basketball Wives Reunion" with me. VH1 no matter how I curse that channel. I find myself still tuning into their cheap reality, regardless of my embarrassment and pity toward the people who settle to be showcased. My so called inner "black activist" self will throw all morals out the window for the sake of my own entertainment. Even when I'm appalled I am in some way still enthralled with the degrading behavior. Before I can get into why I think that is so I think I figured out why so many black men and women decide to succumb to such work. For me money can't put a price on my pride or dignity. Even IF I was money hungry I can't imagine turning into a different person and showing out for a dollar and a little fame. The idea that one person will represent for all of their race is a disgusting policy. But all in all its a dead system of hierarchy that continually proves one race must constantly prove themselves. That group obviously being those who audition,fight,scrape, and will burn down any and every one to get their "spot". I think we all can agree that we would just never end up on "Charmed School" and you couldn't imagine being so ratchet on "The Love of Ray-J".

That would never be you? Right?

Can you imagine if someone offered to pay you $100 dollars a day just to participate in a short game show? Do you think you would turn that down if you were just tired of working your 9-5? All you have to do is read a few lines,wear a few clothes, and basically trade in who you are to be who they want you to be. Think about it. I can't say what I would or wouldn't do because I've never had someone offer me money.

But awhile ago my old step coach asked me what would I do if someone offered me a few million dollars for my line of accessories. Taking a step back I had to be honest and I told her I would decline.

If someone noticed my worth and wanted to triple it for themselves, but kick me out of the picture. It only makes sense for me to put out the work to make that kind of money myself.

My mother had just asked me so simply as if it weren't deep rooted; but why would these women succumb to this kind of behavior? Why were these women dressed in expensive clothing and jewelry treat each other the opposite of their appearances. They were beautiful, they had bodies to die for, and of course, their hair was in place from strand to strand. Yet my mother could not grasp why women who looked of such caliber had attitudes and personalities as nasty as New Jersey smells. And contrary to popular belief not all women who portray these outside beauties have ugly insides. I never could put my finger on it but I do feel I figured out some of this mystery.

I would like to call this the "They chose me system". It is amazing to win, anything in fact. I can safely say that we all want to be the best at something if not everything. It feels damn good to be "chosen". Think back to school at how exhilarating it was to win kick ball or the best painting. I know for me I always looked forward to being "Student of the Month". For my face to be plastered on a huge bulletin board was an honor, it meant that my work and efforts exceeded over everyone in the school. That was something, to rise above alll of the other students and be the best. When you get a chance to win something that you had to work for will show you that any old prize ain't always the best prize.

Then there was the lesson my father taught me that helped filtered out years of me chasing after boys and beating myself up if every guy in school didn't desire me. He told me that they only wanted my draws, nothing more nothing less. At the time of-course I still wanted to be liked and as a young girl I thought I needed the attention. What that did for me was show me that I was not special. Being taught that my flesh was the prize possession I knew it had nothing to do with me. Everyone had flesh and I was no different. I know the negative proportions of that teaching couldn't compare to the humble notions it instilled in me. If I wanted to be treated a certain way I had to make sure someone loved me for who I was and not for what they could get from me.

The women on Basketball Wives feel accomplished to be chosen to be "THEE" Basketball Wife. They get the glory of having fans and haters. They are paid to appear on television as other women were left behind and unpaid. They also reap the benefits of post show stardom (if any). Although these women can pay their full success to the show being their #1 advertisement. I believe that they believe they are successful and have made it. This depends of-course on how you grade success. To go from being "Student of the Month" to being chosen to appear on reality TV which had nothing to do with my homework,attendance,test scores, and overall participation in class. I don't think being mocked and degraded is synonymous to being rewarded as the best and standing out from everyone else.

In My Head

2011-11-20T22:56:00.000-08:00

"The Man in My Basement"

Walter Mosley

Reading has been one of my ALL time favorite hobbies that was discovered very young. I'm sure I've stated this one time or another on here. But I constantly challenged myself to complete the 25 book challenge in grade school. I still have some of my certificates. There is something about a book that completely fills my soul with all sorts of un-explainable happiness. This past summer I have become so indulged in creating (as I had the right to). I totally put off my favorite past time hobbies. I guess I've been trying to spice up my "bio" with more than "I love to read and write". But in all honesty the amount of pleasure and joy I obtain from reading is just indescribable. For me nothing compares to the possible paper cut from my fresh new book. I am an anti- eReader by the way. Its just not the same. What if something happens to my sweet old kindle? How could I possibly pass down my latest read to my friend or child. If you could just disregard my bias and listen to what I'm saying.

I was inspired to create my own list on how to stay creative from this original. Its so easy to become in-tuned with technology and all the greatness it has to offer. I'm all for staying connected and updating. But it can also be counter-productive to constantly working for new and "what's to be". You never get a chance to slow down and see what works and virtually what we end up looking for is the next best thing. Like our ultimate goal is to be ahead at all times but we still end up being in search of something. But not to stray too much off topic like I feel I've done. I began reading again and started slow with a goal of two books a month at random. Of course I'm now reading at the speed of 4 books per week. I buy my books from anywhere I can trying not to glance at the summary so I won't create a pattern.

I finished "The Man in My Basement" earlier today and had the urge to write but not particularly about the book. To start off I was not at all interested in reading any sort of black and white combination. My bad luck has been connecting me with stories that were set during the 1900s and/or are based on the plagues of being black. Now I could care less about offending anyone especially if what I'm stating is opinion based. It's a tired game walking on egg shells because of someone else's sensitive soul. But in concerns to what I would like to not ingest from every single aspect of my life is racism. I am no Oprah I'm aware we live in a racist world and I can see it may be getting worst. From what I read on the internet, to the news, to what I come across every single day without my consent. I would like some sort of control over that topic. I can't escape it and it is not going anywhere. I have been pumped with so much history I can spit it out and rewrite it. I am so sick to my stomach I can't fathom how I actually feel about it. Can a girl at least escape into a world where love is the worlds cure and vampires are superheros?

I did enjoy this interesting dynamic. Besides the unsatisfying end for me I was in-tuned with the real life characters that were put together in this fictitious read. It's a short book but I think worth the after thought.

Fall Collection and Life

2011-08-29T12:42:00.000-07:00

I have been working on so much as of late. This summer has been a step to my next step and I'm so excited to be opening some doors to a new chapter. Between going back to school in New York, moving back to New York and starting my fall collection of bead work (Link'd w Allure). I don't know when I'm going to burn myself out, I will, happily fall onto my floor with exhaustion. I don't want to relieve too much although I have already. I always like to keep things under wraps until I'm completely settled. I've just been away for awhile and couldn't help but to share some exciting news.

I'm also working on my website for "Link'd w Allure" my fall line of beaded necklaces,bracelets, hair accessories, and men's wear. My father was the first to introduce me to beading and his skill has always intimated me of venturing off into my own style. Something inside of me felt that wasn't my area and I should stick with a glue gun and duct tape. But I have been trying things that I have never done before so I can get results I've never gotten. Its always arousing to discover a new "project" to run with. There's a fire that lights and last for long, an encouraging and refreshing burn. You get this push to concur your to do list you've abandon and get things done, all the while closing out other projects.

I took the down time we had during the storm watch to catch up on my men's wear line (Street View) which basically consists of chain, over sized pendants, and beads. I have took all consideration of what I see being sold in and out of stores but most importantly whats being requested by customers. Wrapped it up with my flair and twist and came up with over 50 designs (lol I know get a life). I am beyond confident that I've hit it on the nail with these accessories. I really feel like I need to be after down playing my capability for so long if I don't believe in me then who else will.

Here are a few other snap shots of my bracelets and hair accessories. They will all be available online September 3rd but for now there are a few up in the shop. Once the official website for my fall line hits you will be ale to order all "Link'd w Allure" products along with "Street View". I have yet to take some photos of my necklaces but there will definitely be an official photo shoot once the website is up which will probably be at the end of September.

For now I will leave you with a photo preview and can always promise you your very first update, on me, here at christielover.com.

Pt Two of my Imperfections

2011-08-03T06:44:00.001-07:00

I'm not actually bragging about my bad habits or even boosting about them. I just like to pick and poke at them to create a bigger picture to allow me to shake them off. I'd rather laugh at myself and make the light loader than become self conscious of what could be a serious flaw.

In "My Imperfections Pt. 1" I talk about one of my worst nail biting habits, how cheap I am, and my rawness. They were not so much imperfections but flaws that can be considered "cute" depending on how you are looking at it. I would like to get into a qualitie that have bit me in the ass but ultimately gives me a jump start in life.

I have yet to experience a serious pitfall for my "stubbornness" but I have been praised for it because its viewed as perseverance. I know though, how terrible it can be. I refuse to let down even when I am proven wrong, and even after apologies I deem myself right. I have to see things through my own eyes and no matter if I'm for warned I need to experience it myself. All many terrible character traits that I am constantly being called out for, by close friends and family members. It only bothers me when I know I can't do a switch-a-roo and change up for the better.

I was brought up on being versatile and its imperative to learn to adapt. For better or for worst and specifically for out of comfort zone situations. In terms of me being stubborn as I want to be, it has allowed me to put my foot down on my life goals. Which ultimately made me step my game up and challenge myself furthermore. I have turned this imperfection up to 100 and have allowed myself to say yes when an opportunity arises. No matter the impossible or the circumstance, I have re-taught myself the value of yes and eliminated no.

I have dismissed all my "can'ts" and "won't" and now go by "I will" and "I can". My drive allows me to see things from a different point of view. But my determination will put that view into play and this flaw will eventually get me where I need to go.

You heard that "where I need to go"

Dolls by Tanya

2011-07-24T19:35:00.000-07:00

What I love most about these dolls are the realistic manner that they are in. When I first had a look I instantly thought of my mother then I went onto searching for myself among the flavorful dolls. I did find me, she had her hair short and spiked like I did at the time. She was the closet thing I have ever seen (besides those Chrisite barbie dolls I see floating around Tumblr and not Toys'R'Us) that looked like me. I was instantly in awe and impressed at the execution of black woman, they were nothing more and nothing less. Everything about the dolls speak to me as a black woman and I am so grateful to know one. She has such an unapologetic talented which allowed her to be able to make a black woman so perfectly.

When I look as these dolls so many thoughts trace through my mind which one of the first are of my mother(s). How strongly they resemble the women who raised (and continue to raise me). The dolls exude their strength through their thick thighs and hips. I can feel their independence and funk through their fly shoes and hair. From their earrings I can see their femininity and by the way their arms are crossed I know they are ladies with men abilities. Another thought that comes to mind are all the images I've seen of black woman from birth to this day on and I must say they do not compare. I should be able to read a book as a little one and see myself looking back at me. I should be able to turn on the television and see myself prancing by, there is no reason I should have to search high and low for role models.

When I look at these dolls I can't help but to smile because they truly make me feel strong and beautiful.

Hopefully with more support and exposure Tanya of MontQ can take what we really look like world wirde

You can email her @ dollsbymontq@aol.com for inquiries of her fabulous dolls

Or you can purchase her dolls @ The Reading Terminal in Philadelphia,PA

12th & Arch streets

Isn't She Fly?

wrapped in love

2011-07-06T14:03:00.001-07:00

My life is officially complete because I have been able to obtain a few wrap dresses. WHY didn't anyone tell me about the convenience of such a dress? I've been vending and attending street festivals all my life. I remember being dragged on the train and the bus with my other siblings to these shows. I hated them they felt like such a waist of time (because I was being forced to work). Since there was so many of us I never got a chance to buy what I wanted. I was lucky if I got a fruit salad or a plate of food. So for awhile I had to pass up on all the wonderful treasures you get from all these fairs. The expensive handmade but well worthy items. I did buy my first leather belt and bag a few years ago from a family friend. If you are a Brooklyn native and frequent these fairs you should know of George; very pleasant and family oriented. He makes the hell out of leather goods. It saddens me to just now jump on the band wagon because I wasn't able to afford most of the items I was raised around. I lived at these fairs and have accommodated them to my life ( and not because its apart of my parents lifestyle). It pleases me to now be able to buy whatever I want because I have my own table of products to sell.

It's a blessing also that I am able to apply my vending skills to real life. I can use and apply them for my own small business. It was always one of those family activities that I dreaded doing because I didn't know the value. Now I can really appreciate the customer service skills that I've learned and how to be business oriented. Being able to change a 10X10 space and down size to 8X10. I can use those skills to design a store once I decide to open one. There are a lot factors that play into it and I'm happy I have them to use to my advantage.

This was the third day at the International Festival in Brooklyn. It was fairly slow and rainy. But I was lucky enough to be as fly as I wanted to be in my wrap dress.

Click for more photos after the link.

You can few more photos from the festival here

2011-07-06T01:22:00.001-07:00

This weekend was one of many others to this summer. I worked hard at the International festival in Brooklyn at Commodore Barry. I was greeted with newer customers and was able to expand with the word of mouth method from older customers. I love how women let us know that they were looking for our booth. They searched high and low and kept their wallets tights because they knew they would find us. I love our customers and they are one of the reasons we are still strong. We have an extremely strong and loyal clientele in Brooklyn and Washington. I really hope it will only grow stronger and wider. I hope our customers stick by no matter what changes we make and no matter how far we go.

We've been working on the family's website and a headache I must say. I have been told a few times how I should think about dipping into web designing because of my website's outcome. I know I am no professional and have not had any practice on training on any other website. Before I think about web designing on a serious scale I would need a better computer and better computer software. I would have to learn how to use photo shop for graphic skills because lord knows I don't know what I'm doing when it comes to editing.

I have gotten a few paid offers for websites but I had to refuse. Not only will it slow down my own work but I am not ready for the headache. Its a miracle I have finished mine in 2 1/2 months. After making my own it makes sense why web designers are getting paid big money. But again I am no professional I would feel terrible about taking money from someone when I have no real skills. Just a talent and knack for mastering anything I put my mind to. Maybe next year I will think about it but right now web designing is not on my list of things to do.

This was before I started my work weekend at International and missed the fireworks for the 4th or 5th year in a row. I have been the festival for a long time now and have yet to miss a year. Before work I got a chance to have a picnic in Central Park one of my all time favorite activities. I can't wait to bring my kids out on as many out door events as possible. Camping is a MUST and so is barbequing there will be no if ands or buts. Speaking of children I am worried for my life about my future seeds. I feel like I already have my own because of my many neices and nephews from my cousins and sisters. I get to experience being a mom before carrying my own and going through labor. Go here to read on why I am in fear for their future.

Also go to wrappedinbows for photos from the International Festival in Brooklyn this past weekend.

Go here to read on a few things I have learned this 4th of July weekend

Stompin' in the Savoy

2011-07-06T01:20:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of viewing an old black film from the early 1990's which was based on the 1930's "Stompin' in the Savoy". It was a late night and my television was on Centric (one of my favorite channels). There wasn't much info that I dug up on but I did find out that it was directed by Debbie Allen. To name a few the movie features Lynn Whitfield, Vanessa Williams and Jasmine Guy.

The movie is based on the lives of 4 young women searching for themselves and the struggles they have to go through living in New York City during the 1930's. I myself have learned a few life lessons from the hour and change film. From a collection of my own tribulations between living with a friend and helping a friend. I have drawn a lot from the very realistic line up. In the movie the girls share a room from an apartment together which equipped with two beds and a bathroom down the hall. Clearly an extremely tight situation. It was infatuating for me to see some of my favorite looks being worn originally. It was also agitating for me to see today's individuals completely swallowing the fashions of another generation instead of incorporating the style. I have never favored ones style who happen to have a copy and pasted wardrobe from another time period. It shows their appreciation for the time but really shows how lazy they are. When you are inspired by something/someone it shouldn't be your place to duplicate it. When you don't put your own spin on it and conform it to your style then you don't have one to showcase and you are not original. So all in all visually I was in heaven. From the fur coats to the every day dress wear I was able to appreciate a time that my very father was born into.

According to Pauline (Vanessa Williams) it has always been a necessity to dress inline with your personality and not your budget/career. Basically dress to impress. I now see now how imperative it is to dress as if you are going somewhere important, every day. A lesson I have gotten from my father and has been drilled into my head since grade school. Always appear clean and cut. Most of the movie until key scenes I totally forgot that Pauline was a singer. Had little money to work on, was struggling and juggling her jobs every other week, and also shared a room with 3 other women. Even in the movie she convinced me that she had been rich all along.
I was in love with the idea of 4 women living together and not fighting over a man or something ridiculous. Besides the very regular bickering I love how close they were and went around and worked with their very cramped space. I have always had a slight disturbing love for female friends, especially of a group 3 or more. And when I say friends I mean real friends not the we-look-cute-together-so-we-hang-out kind of friends. OR the "we've been friends since we were 14 and I'm use to you" kind of friendship. I'm talking about the friends that hurt when you hurt and smile when you smile. The kind of friends that will do ANYTHING for you and dare you to try and re-pay. The friends that only want to see you doing your very best in life and are there for you and you only. The kind of friends you can't imagine your life without and will do whatever you can to keep them around. I'm talking about those real girlfriends that genuinely love each other-those friendships in particular are the ones I obsess over. Because I was blessed enough to have 5 sisters of my own I have never had friends like I had sisters. But I still appreciate the women who do find their sisters from another mother. In the movie they weren't all the best of friends and didn't particularly like each other towards the middle and end. But it was how they lived in one space and found a way to be civil and not fight every minute over nothing.

After living with a best friend of my own (now ex because of our arrangement) I can understand their struggle whole-heartily and appreciate their cordial behavior. It is very hard living with a friend when their isn't a common ground on what one room mate is use to and what the other isn't familiar with; heads clash and lions roar. Of course the amount of maxi pads and estrogen flying around doesn't help the union of female room mates, that still certainly isn't an excuse. I do believe it has a lot of do with a woman not being so use to bowing down to another's requests,needs,wants, and opinions. There is something much more deadly in a females ego that just can't touch a man's. There is a powerful force that can not be beat or stopped once it has took a place and made a decision. It is made up of mainly stubbornness and intuition; two things that don't match. Once a woman has made up her mind about something, that is pretty much it on everyone's feelings. I was able to draw my conclusion from experience and from Esther (Lynn Whitfield's character). Alice I believe had asked Esther to play the numbers for her who so happen to owe Esther money. This wasn't the first time she played for her and it was clear that Esther just knew Alice wasn't going to win. But long story short Alice numbers won and Esther made it up in her mind that she wasn't going to share the ticket or her new found fortune with Alice.

I can't really say what I would do if I were to be in that situation, naturally I would tell myself of course I would have shared the money or at least given my friend a portion. But I don't know if I would've flipped it the way Alice did. She eventually invested in her own beauty salon and used her clientele from her old salon (as a washer) in her new store. She had a vision for herself and a drive that allowed her to achieve it. During the process she lost herself and became cut throat and greedy. I can understand how one was once poor and refuses to return to that life style. I can't contest to celebrities like Kimora Lee Simmons who was once poor and is now filthy rich. I have no opinion on their controlling and nasty attitudes. When you have grown up without something and you finally obtain it you really don't want to go back. And in the movie Alice became very vicious because of her fear of needing again. I can not blame her, who would want to
go back to sharing a bedroom with 3 other women. What I think of her back stabbing and promiscuous ways is another story I just can't completely comment on where it stems from. She wanted to live a life that she never had before and she basically didn't want to look back. Who am I to judge when I know what it feels like to not want to go back.

But without giving away the movie this is a definite must see. You will be able to appreciate the fashions of the 1930's, the award winning acting, and learn about friendship up and downs.

within my travels

2011-06-27T09:42:00.000-07:00

I have always loved traveling since I was a little girl, it was always the most exciting for me to get lost on my way to Far Rockaway, Queens. It was an adventure when my day camp would walk from 5th street (lower east side) to central park for picnics. Be it by train, cab, mega bus, or plane (not quit yet). I love to travel. A few weekends ago I took a trip to DC/Baltimore and was I so surprised at the blatant segregation. To my dismay I couldn't really grasp "the chocolate city" being uninformed in terms of diversity. Blacks use to hold 70% of DC's population and has dropped to 50% since the 80s. What is changing beside the cost of living? If I've always known DC for its overwhelming flood of prideful individuals (like myself) what exactly is keeping the city from merging together as one. I felt like an alien as if my color wasn't seen or welcomed. To throw out a few variables to the weird stares I don't think my outfit qualified me for evil looks. I think I was dressed at the excepted level of an outsider; a simple skirt and sandals . I wasn't trying too hard to tone anything down but I figured I was in chocolate city so whatever I did the residents were use to by now. I am still trying to come up with reasonable reasons for anyone to have looked at me funny. This is my second or third trip to DC and each visit I have came up with a different review.

I have been to a community event where I've gotten a taste of family and the love that DC has to offer. I thought I loved DC as a whole but I could only reside in a particular areas. Not to say that DC is the only majority black city with segregation. But again I was still surprised at how blatant it was. I was floating around the white house so I will admit that I did expect more, much more. We are TOO far down in our society to still have this much segregation anywhere. And although propaganda is still a serious practice, does having a black president mean anything? There things that are suppose to shift ones mind eventually even after years of brainwashing. Why do I have to walk down a street and still feel like I don't belong? There is something very wrong with the idea of the only brown people (employees) in a restaurant not wanting to recognize my face and explore what we have in common. That should an automatic.

I would only visit Baltimore because of the sheer stillness and relaxation it brings. I would love to live in DC for a year or two to go into my past experiences and analyze them.

Here is what I wore that day thinking it was "regular enough" to fit in.

I brought this lovely bag at Odunde from Ms. Geri White. She hand paints her bags and t-shirt. I fell madly in love with her brown skinned Betty Boop bags and I end up being forced to view her sexy t-shirts up close. Because I'd rather have someone tagging along with me in my travels that looks like me. I had to buy this lovely bag to compliment my brown skin.

Here are a few photos of her hand painted t-shirts

(Hand Painted T-Shirts you can call her at (202) 882-2788)

New Store

2011-06-27T07:37:00.000-07:00

A few weekends ago I was in Baltimore and I took a trip down to DC on a short birthday retreat. I found myself at the lovely Rosa Mexicano over on 7th street at F street (across from the Verizon center). I did a little research and found out that there are a few locations in New York. For some reason somewhere inside of me wants to believe those locations are just as good as the one I been to in DC. But I was so amazed at how well prepared the meals were at such a cheap cost. I thought it was treatment I wouldn't be able to get anywhere else.

My experience in DC/Baltimore was nothing short of my feelings in Philadelphia, PA. There is nothing but blatant segregation and a flow of people stuck in another decade. I couldn't imagine living in DC more more then 2 years and Maryland is nice for a short time. But I can see myself traveling all the wee hours to indulge in the ambiance of Rosa Mexicano. Our waiter just so happen to be one of the best in the house (I'm almost sure of it) not only was he not hard to look at but he represented all of what they had to offer. Presentation and food being all of those things, looking over the menu I wasn't expecting anything lavishing. Because there was nothing on the menu that reached $50.00 and most of the food started at $15.00. The whole atmosphere and elegant decor made me think twice about the pricing but in this case I got much more then what I paid for. My food not to mention was as good as it looked I was also extremely impressed at the perfect mix of chocolate and spices. As he explained it I was so interested at this concoction and couldn't wait to dig my face into it. It is as divine as it looks and I wish my memory would allow me to remember the name. I'm sure everything on the menu is just as good because their food is actually as genuine as they claim it to be. I highly suggest everyone to visit Rosa Mexicano if you haven't already and I'm just late in the game.

You can visit their website to find out your convenient location.

Playing it cool

2011-06-13T00:47:00.000-07:00

It never mattered if I agreed on their topics there is something about their unapologetic manner that attracts me and keeps me reading. I am in love of their fearless and encouraging articles. I suggest every and all black women to indulge in Clutch Magazine at least once a week for a does.

(via Clutch)

The “race card” is a concept that has been used to silence people of color who attempt to speak out when they feel that race has been used unfairly in determining how people are treated. It is one of the most dangerous weapons in the White privilege toolbox, for it implies that a non-POC would know better when something is truly racist than someone who is constantly subjected to racism. That said, it isn’t that people of color can never be wrong about denouncing something as racism, but that they should be treated with a level of deference when expressing their concerns. Instead of having something dismissed as someone pulling a card, these complaints should be respectfully analyzed and received. If someone is truly committed to being non-racist, the appropriate reaction to a charge of racism is “I don’t feel like what I did was racist. Can you help me understand why you feel that way?”, not accusing someone of using race to be manipulative or deceitful.
But, alas, in a world of White privilege where is the incentive to say “You’re right, that was racist of me”? or “I didn’t mean to be racially insensitive”? And for even those who pride themselves in being non-racist, where would a non-Black person be taught the difference? If racism doesn’t negatively impact you in a very obvious way, it’s quite a task to say, “hey, let me learn about this so I make sure that I’m not out here supporting an unfair system of advantage that benefits me.”
It’s an amazingly duplicitous thing, to flip racism around so that the person who is the victim now looks like the guilty party because of their observations of someone’s behavior. A Black woman who feels that she has been passed over for a raise because of her background may be told that she is ‘pulling the race card’ and that racism will never end so long as people like her “see race in everything.” But how can you not see something that is constantly there?
The race card concept implies that the true racial power in this country lies in the hands of minorities, and that as soon as we “cry racism,” we will then be allowed to get away with anything or to unjustly persecute innocent White people. This is so infrequently the case. We holler “race” because so often it IS about race. While racism should not instill in Black folks a sense of paranoia, we must be constantly diligent and aware of how we are being treated. I do not wish to be color-blind. I am glad that I am aware of the racial climate that I live in, so that I may arm myself accordingly for whatever may come my way. We will never end or even lessen racism so long as we are made to be afraid to challenge it. Thus, I understand that the “race card” that I carry is not some get-out-of-culpability trump card, but instead, a challenging reality that I have been dealt.
written by Jamilah Lemieux

Stripped

2011-06-11T22:09:00.002-07:00

I said this before but I'll say it again but there is something about this haircut that makes me want to show off. I really feel like taking this care free thing to another level. If I put no work into my hair why do the same for my clothes. I had already vowed to not wear any clothes this summer and get my day and night dress on. Dresses every day because its simply too much work to do to worry about clothes or hair. Those are really the last things that I need to think about anyway.

I took this photos a few weeks ago in new york in a night/night dress.

Give away winner

2011-06-11T22:09:00.001-07:00

My first year at a Odunde was a blessed one I hope to be there next year and the next. Again because of our success I will be doing another give away but it will more grande and with a partnership. It will be a package deal of InMyImage big and bold earrings along with a feather earring set. I plan to hold it in the beginning of July.

I want to thank everyone who participated and re-blogged my give away it was effective.

The winner is Katelin of http://ivekissedthelips.tumblr.com If you can email me your mailing address at

makeithappen.accessories@gmail then I will gladly send you your earrings.

Dara.

2011-06-11T20:56:00.000-07:00

I am always searching high and low for ladies that I feel make the cut and I never wanted it to be a list of my personal friends and women I only know. But I realized those are the only folks that I can past judgement on. Because of the lack of authenticity and general personal style its a bit difficult to fish out the real from the fake. All you have to do is dress with the right components (thrift, name-brand, trendy) and your style is it and its a go. There doesn't have to be anything personal about your style as long as it falls into those categories then you're a style icon. Its almost impossible to decipher someone is who trendy and someone who is stylish. And its even more difficult to decipher the difference between someone who's been loyal to fashion and the pretenders. You really just have to know someone personally before you can make a real judgement.

But when I first created this tag I was interested in showing respect to the amazing women that I come across. Some I know personally and some not so personally but have gotten a chance to through a blog. The women that inspire me that make me think "damn she's fly"

I bring you Dara my sister friend that I met when I was 14 years old and working at my first job with summer youth. Since then we have always stayed in contact and eventually performing together on the elite Pink Diamonds Step Team. I have always been attracted to her drive and her ability to be so involved with every thing. Its an honor to be her friend because I just know what shes going to make of herself when the dust clears.

She has managed to dance, sing, and act her way through grade and high school. She has always been the caption or president of every team shes ever played for. And recently she has danced and traveled with an all black marching band at Howard University. It would take a few more posts to get in every one of her achievements but I don't want to forget to mention how she is a black belt and has been an honor student all her life.

I have always been one to boast about someone else's growth because its beautiful when you are apart of it and witness it before your very eyes. But make sure you look out for Dara because trust and believe that she will be on your screen preaching to our next generation and then some.

You can follow her on her Tumblr and on her Twitter

Isn't She Fly!

Really Tyrese?

2011-06-07T18:18:00.000-07:00

There are too many well made and creative movies going around (A.I, Avatar, Fire&Ice, The 10th Kingdom, Boomerang, Wise Girls, The Lion King, The Fifth Element, Inception, etc) for me to even have watch Legion but I will blame Netflix. I knew from the previews that it was a bad idea, although you shouldn't judge something before you experience it. That actually doesn't matter because I was in fact right about this one. I knew from the beginning it wasn't worth a view or even a critic but wow. I mean I didn't know movies could still be released if they were this bad. I remember reading a review from CultureCynic about how terrible it was. Now I read through it knowing before hand I wasn't going to see it myself. I just couldn't imagine a movie being as bad as how she describe. But really she was a little light on it. Terrible can not describe and I am not here to look for the words.

I would like to address the blatant stereotype and racism that Tyrese took part in. I have been hearing great reviews about his book and I have yet to read it. Before I make a statement about anyone I like to know a large piece about them; his book being an excellent way to see his side of life in general. But really your representation is just as good to use for any prejudgment. Its unfair but its realistic and how our brain works no matter how much we pretend like we are not bias. It is in our own favor to try our best to control and modify what we choose as independent representations. It is impossible to honor this because honestly we can't control everything that we are judge by. There are things we have NO control over. But so we won't work against ourselves it is extremely important to be picky with things that will shape our image ultimately.

The role he played was barely laughable but pretty much sad and I for one can't refer to his book as his bible because of the roles he excepts. I think if anything is worth doing its worth doing right. And as far as I'm concern Tyrese Gibson hit the nail on the head with this one. I want to believe he didn't read the script and he was blind sided by the role his character played. I want to believe this all but I can't. His role portrays everything I don't want for black male actors which are stereotypes that can actually be applied to real life. But its not about that, its about the cheap, uncreative, and the remaining of the characters that black men are stuck with. There would be no complaint on my side if variety was shown when it came to showcasing the different shapes, roles, and the amount of strength that black men possess. How family orientated and sharp REAL black MEN are, its unfortunate that the world doesn't know they do not come a dime a dozen. I meet and see them ALL the time.

I don't appreciate one species and race being water down into these few attributes that someone wants to highlight. Because black men are ONLY too sensitive and shy or overly aggressive and inconsiderate. If I was an alien and I had one American news station to connect with for resources. As far as I was concerned black men only wear baggy clothes and are never with their baby mothers. NEVER. I would be embarrassed if I was Tyrese to have except that role and played it "well". I didn't know those roles were still written I just had no idea. I would love to say something personally to all the directors, producers, and writers who support and put out those roles.

But then I would be "racist".

I would like to say that we have got to realize that racism is actually stronger than it was years ago. It has become more apparent to me that it is not getting better and it is only getting worst. Having a black president has only highlighted how racist politicians really are (not that anyone was fooled before he was in office). Barack Obama has made those closeted racist come out and say hello with more than enough justifications. So no we are not there yet whatever there is suppose to be; I presume equality was only the goal right?

Right!

Well I don't know about Tyrese or any other black man wearing a dress but I will not be catching that bone that is thrown my way. I will make my own production with MY movies so I will not have to settle to be the sassy black girl that snaps her fingers and rolls her neck. I will not try and join any team that only wants to glorify my bad attributes and shows no progress after hundreds of years. So please say "no" black people because there is no reason for us to settle when we have each other.

Day 3

2011-06-04T16:08:00.000-07:00

The last set of photos from BAM.

My dear mother

lol I love this photo

With fellow blogger AGrlCanMac

Daughter of a family friend, can't express how much I love her locks.

One of my favorite earrings that I had to rock myself once or twice.

Day two

2011-06-03T23:22:00.000-07:00

The second day is always the most eventful and exciting my shoes sure helped the spirit. I finally pulled out my summer shoes that I brought awhile ago from Aldo. I have planned my three outfits for BAM like I do every year and I had a beautiful pair of wedges to go with one. So when I seen these shoes circulating on Tumblr I was convinced they were for me. It didn't matter how much they were I had to have them. I actually planned to wear these in the snow because they are so fly.

All I know is Aldo needs to sponsor me or something because the amount of people that stopped me for photos were ridiculous. I'm going to be knocking on their door one of these days. Although they are comfortable they are too high to wear all day, so with breaks in between I was good. They were perfect for the event and I can't wait to come up with different outfits. It was funny picking out the earrings to match because I have so many color combos I had plenty to match with. I will probably make a few to go based off inspiration.

Here are more photos from BAM and check back on the website for all the photos from the three days.

My sister before we were PD sisters my very supportive friend Dara

A loyal customer wearing my feather earrings

My writer friend Lee and her friend

One of my favorite colors to play with this pastel creamy pink is so much fun to work with.

Sister Abena wearing a custom In My Image earring (my mother) and my very own feather earring

In My Image earrings and earring boards to display lock adornments and ear spheres

End of the day sale

2011-06-01T19:07:00.000-07:00

All you have to do to win is take the link of this post and promote it on any social site of your choice. Then post that link in the comment section to show your promotion.

Give away starts tonight and ends June 13, Monday.

This is for anyone who never made it to BAM or any other shows.

You don't have to be a follower of this blog or my friend of any other site

(1.) You must take this link (http://www.christielover.com/2011/06/end-of-day-sale.html)

(2.) Then post your promo link into the comment section for proof

(3.) It is your choice if you want to show pictures but you must explain the give away

I wanted to make it as simple as possible. Everyone is eligible to win.

Day 1

2011-05-31T23:45:00.000-07:00

BAM was such a success this weekend I am so excited at the outcome. I have so so many photos to edit and upload which will be available on Charmedfeathers in about a week. The feedback was exciting and flattering.

I came across Ahseik over her youtube channel who stopped me for my info at my booth on day 2.

You can see me all cheesy face at mark 5:30.

As always I felt welcomed and felt at home like I've been there and never left. And because it was such a nice turn out I will be holding a give away very soon for an earth tone earring necklace. You won't have to be a follower but you will have to promote the post on FB, twitter, etc and leave a comment with that link. It will be fly and I'm sure some lucky lady will be happy with it.

Day one wasn't one of my fly days. I had to get up at 4am to drive to NY and prepare for this big show. So looking cute was out of the question. I threw on this $10 dress and sandals along with my huge earrings to match. Although theres nothing simple about my earrings I was trying for comfort and simplicity.

Listening to...

2011-05-24T23:40:00.000-07:00

Something has been telling me to give Cee-lo Green a chance because I have neglected him after his hit single "Crazy" for no reason. But after seeing this video

and his recent single with Melanie Fiona I realized he's no one to sleep on. Heres three songs I've been bumping to that I wanted to share. Tyler, The Creator is not someone I would typically listen to and I'm not sure how I found this song but I like it.

I love the Bob Marley feel to this old John Legend and The Roots colabo.

Create a MySpace Playlist at MixPod.com

Countdown

2011-05-24T19:48:00.000-07:00

I can't keep myself on one project because I am so excited for this years BAM festival. Its my most anticipated pre-summer event. This is my second year selling my own jewelry and I am much more prepared with a larger inventory. It so happen that I cooked up my best ideas after BAM (being before the summer every memorial weekend). I always had my good stuff during the summer and had to wait till the following year to show case my new creations. This year I am extremely excited to show off why I quit my 9-5.

Quitting was by far the best decision I have made this year. Not only was it draining, it was pointless, and had absolutely nothing to do with my career path. I was doing more working and less talking and we ALL know how much I love talking. I needed to be around people, interacting, and do what I do best. Sales. I would like to focus 100% on Make It Happen which seems to be possible after 2 years of struggling for a consistent income. I love that I can do something I love while making money AND growing as a person. Its depressing to think of all the months, hours, and days we waist at a job that does not show case everything we're about. Let alone allow half of what we can do to be done. I realized I'd rather struggle with a some what consistent wage and guaranteed contentment then be unhappy. The idea of not being able to express myself KILLS me, literally so I had to do. Now I understand those people who quit out of no where with no warning or previous preparation. Something clicks and it doesn't matter if we have to struggle for the next 5 years we refuse to settle and be that unhappy for little to nothing.

In my mind I have already set up a mind set that'll prepare me for the next few months. Like every thing I scheme on I would like them to be in effect so I kick them into action immediately. One thing I can't stand is someone who talks yet has nothing to back it up. So as much as I talk I need to have some sort of material to justify my words. Two summers ago I was focusing on my original creations; my headbands. I was more so excited with the new venture then anything. My mother was so proud because she as an artist has been waiting for all her children to find their own tunnels of creativity sooner or later. I finally found mine magically after moving to Philly and looking for my groove and like most things I do I would like to share with the world. I started with Buffalo Exchange in Center City (sigh) here I talk about my lost and gain.

Me and my mom talking business (I was more than likely not listening) lol kidding

The weirdest thing about the transaction is I am always big on people getting over on me, it just rarely happens. I have never been in the predicament but it still seemed so out of character of me to not stand up to that man or speak my piece. I know that was the first and will lead as a control on what to do when this happens again. I know I swore off consignment and wholesale but I was so vulnerable I really didn't know how to deal. I think the key mistake I made was not going over my value and worth with myself BEFORE I walked into the store and tried to sell them my items. I can't leave it up to a complete stranger to tell me what my product is worth. I am the original designer, with the original ideas, and the original receipts. I am the one who came out of pocket for materials, I am the one who dug deep to pull from my creative juices. I did the work. I should get the credit. That was the mistake I made when I didn't realize those things now I have a more clear outlook when dealing with a 2nd and 3rd party.

I only control half of what's going on I can't think about what they are going to do with my items. All I can control is the respect I have for my work and hopefully that will ultimately pass through the store owner and be projected when my items are displayed in their store. I have created my wholesale list and special packages to enable more control. I think I'm ready to go at this full time and participating in consignment is the best thing I can do. Not only will I be getting more involved on the market but I will be able to make money in my sleep (a goal I've had since last year). Its sad that it took me 2 years to get with the program but I wasn't ready and everything was about timing.

Since last month I have sold to 3 different locations (you can click for website and directions) the top being the most recent I have done business with.

Nangellini located on 832 South Street in
Philadelphia P.A, 19147S

Anacostia Art Gallery & Boutique located on 2806 Bruce Pl SE in
Washington D.C.,20020

AiCandy Boutique located on 1588 Maple Ave Hillside in
N.J., Hillside 07112

Join me and my family this year at BAM for our newest bigger and bolder original accessories. We will be in Lot 3 space #6
Brooklyn, New York
Memorial Weekend

I am excited for my ventures and this upcoming summer. I am looking forward to sharing my work with more shops. So if you know of any boutiques that are looking for original preferably handmade jewelry.
You can email me at Rebekah@charmedfeathers.com

And Brooklyn I'm coming for you next!

2011-05-01T16:51:00.000-07:00

Check out Make It Happen's New and Official website

www.CharmedFeathers.com

up and running

2011-05-01T12:38:00.000-07:00

Its been long over due but I've finally finished my website for Make It Happen. You guys have to be gentle with me its my first and I'm still adding a few perks here and there. So here is the main source for all the events, info, and photos.

Here I am in NY doing a little supply shopping preparing for BAM, memorial weekend. I'm still loving my cut and still feeling sexy.

lady day

2011-04-10T22:41:00.000-07:00

I was introduced to Maimouna Youseef; beautiful songwriter,poet, and emcee while I was in DC. I have never heard and was so eager to after her husband and manager boasted about how amazing she is. When I did meet her I couldn't agree more. I did my homework and found out that she IS something to brag about. Back in 2007 she received a grammy nomination for the song "Don't Feel Right" with the roots. I learned this all after I listened to her EP and fell in love with her like she was my wife.

I loved the way they worked this sample because now I want so much more. She gives me so much life and I am patiently waiting for her album in full. Black Magic Woman is now on my phone.

from the beginning

2011-04-10T08:23:00.000-07:00

I FEEL SO GOOD!

I can't believe it took me so long to cut my hair. I know I've been wanting to for the longest. If you've been following me on twitter then you seen me twit pic a photo of Jada Pinkett. I remember when I first seen Set it Off I made a vow to cut my hair as low as hers. She looked too good for me to not want to.

I've been talking a lot about wearing all black and toning down my look (for whatever reason I have no idea why). But I think I'm done and I'm ready to turn it back up.

I have so many hair style ideas I've been dying to do. My old cut was so tired. But I need to get back in touch with my real funkiness and all that jazz.

I don't know why I thought it would take me awhile to get use to it. But as soon as it was half way off I knew I made the right choice. I am more in love with the camera. Without hair everything seems to look 1,000 better.

Here are a few snapshots and me and my new cut and I'm sure you can see how comfortable I am with it. I just feel like I was always suppose to be bald and nothing else.

Why I love being black:the reminder

2011-04-05T18:36:00.000-07:00

This weekend I had the pleasure of joining a very welcoming and loving community of Washington DC. We indulged in a eventful weekend of dance, forums, workshops, and an endless amount of love. I mean there was so much joy being spread around it was overwhelming.

Walking through the doors we were immediately welcomed with open arms and assistance. I felt the warm spirit in the air instantly. Day one was refreshing to be around people who were actually happy to see me. Just off the fact that we had the same skin color. I was in awe and relieved at the family orientated conversation strangers threw at me from left to right. I was all smiles and in giggles from hugs and chatter. There is nothing I love more then a group of people enjoying each others company just because. I speak on it all the time and find a way to dream of it too. Anything that is family orientated is a go for me and if it has anything to do with my people then it is an extra cherry on top.

Since we were so use to getting the cold and bloody shoulder from our own in Philly we noticed the difference right away. Take no offense you veterans of Philadelphia and those who actually live by "being brotherly". It is not you I am talking about. But the majority and the 80% encounters I come across. I don't feel the love AT ALL and I have never been scared to say it out loud. Considering that it is so obvious to my New York family we are not the only to notice. But the very people of Philadelphia more then agree with us.

It is never a shock though when I'm surrounded by the norm but its a simple reminder of why I truly love black people. Being in Philly as not scared my view on and I don't think it can ever. I know when I have entered a scarce neighborhood. I can decipher right and wrong which does not include being
Its very easy for me to know what a real black man looks like because my present father. I have seen first hand what they sacrifice, what they strive to teach, and what their presence does in a full family home.
So to be amongst it once against made me fall in love two times over.

It was a true vacation by day two as I watched "the graduation" a tribute/performances of young men and women entering their adulthood. I was close to tears as the amount of joy escalated in the room I mean I literally had to exit.

I watched children be children with very much respect for their elders. They were cordial and stayed with the other children. I watched the women walk with grace and confidence with one another, their strength beaming from their talk to their clothes. The oldest men and women were still very rigid but sweet. I adored watching the mentors discipline the young men of tomorrows future. It was just wonderful because out of all the push-ups and work out, they were still having fun. The young men had no room to mistaken the love their mentors had for them. They were teaching them how to be real men and that is enough validation they could ever ask for. I truly believe that we are all related so it was nothing but a thang to be reconnected again with everyone.

I think its becoming harder and harder to identify with my people more recently then ever. I think its safe to say that we are still going through an identity crisis. I see how it can be easy to lose touch with what black really is, well for me at least. Being black is SO many things which is why I am so in love with it. Just to name a few but our strength, style, tender love are the main reasons I will forever root and cheer. But its our no apologetic attitude that lets me know I'm not standing alone. In our conversation you just know its going to take a little more than a few Wikipedia facts to change our mind. We are stubborn to the core and as much as it might be a con it will bring us fourth many accomplishments.

This weekend I was not only selling jewelry and networking. I was hanging out with my distant siblings from DC, we had some catching up to do anyway.

Glove Love

2011-03-28T23:32:00.000-07:00

I have a serious obsession with all accessories. I rather have a swarm of jewelery then new jeans or a blouse. I lust over Erykah Badu because she always has the best accessories. I especially love hand made (obviously) but I really love to buy handmade jewelry.

It actually becomes a burden at how much we have to choose from. I spend a month ravishing over one thing at a time. For example I had to stop buying rings because simply I was too into my earrings. But I forget how much I adore the big chunkiness on my hand and what they do for outfits. The small ones also. I can't keep up with all of them so I try to focus on one at a time. I am usually collecting winter wear all season round the gloves, hats, and scarfs. I hate not being prepared and I don't get along with the cold. I do in fact have a special love for gloves. I use to dread wearing those big ugly mittens when I was little, to date they were the ugliest gloves that I have ever worn. I have photos of me wearing them and I just shake my head and hug my glove collection.

I literally take my gloves and pour them onto my bed and just admire them, just like in the movies. I was browsing online though and found these two shops that sell beautiful designs.

I also love love love Aldo accessories and Zara who always impresses with their designs.

Zen and Coffee

Brenda Abdullah

photos via

Big change

2011-03-28T22:41:00.000-07:00

It always seems like I have things that I don't, like these black pumps that I have never owned.

Lately I have been going for more a "conservative Rebekah" not doing things too crazy. Its probably because I've been too lazy to put something serious together. Or that my things haven't been fully laid out for the past six months, where I can pick and choose. I'm not a fan of playing dress up and being a slave to my hair. Which is why I want to go for a look that matches my exact attitude. If you follow me on twitter you might know what I'm talking about.

This summer I figured I would finally cut all my hair off like I've been dying to for the longest. Clearly cutting anything on my head is not a big deal for me since I snip it maybe once a month. I know its going to grow back and maybe I am a little scared but its now or never. I'm also still contemplating about a nose ring since I change my mind like I change underwear. I don't like anything to be permanent and I would hate to have a permanent mark on my nose.

I'm going to look like I jumped out of Pocahontas and I am going to love it. Nothing but long skirts, dresses, and wedges for me this upcoming summer.

Heres a few photos of me last week before I hopped back on the Chinese bus and headed home :(

love and fear

2011-03-24T07:57:00.000-07:00

I watched this this morning and I had to share. I love thats its in New York and you guys know how much I love NY.

Equal or the Same

2011-03-20T22:47:00.000-07:00

Being in a relationship has been such a learning experience. I've learned more about men then I have ever known before. But more importantly about the unfairness and continuous double standard between men and women in this world. Each and every time it hits me that it is alive and REAL I get very angry. Growing up in a house hold with 5 girls and 2 boys I later learned that it's rooted deep and stems from a long time ago. My dad being old school and raised on all of that he was the first to teach me that men have it much easier then women. In between balancing what' s right, what's wrong, and what I'm going to have to suck up and get over. I have been able to make my relationship better and demand more from it.

I recently had an extensive conversation about dealing with flirting and the hardships of interacting with the opposite sex when in a relationship. One bump I personally had to overcome fast was realizing that I am not the only one who finds my man attractive. Not that this was something I didn't take note of before we began dating. It just wasn't something I thought would ever be an issue. But its a shock at how many more people find your partner attractive after their involved. Which is extremely sad but one of the first bumps that I had to get over so I can live comfortably. We also spoke on what to do and how to deal with someone openly flirting or trying to "bag" your partner right in front of you. The reaction varies from person and honestly there can't be a what-to-do in those situations because they are all different. At first it was easy for me to point the blame at my man only to realize that you can not control what someone does or says. Next it was my idea to steer clear of anyone who does not have the same organs as you, only to realize, ofcourse that that is impossible. No matter how much I don't want this to be but men and women are magnets to each other and no one relationship is going to stop that. I then came to terms with the idea of someone hitting on my man theres no need to get my panties in a bunch because at the end of the day he is mine. Its OK if someone got the memo late but there is much flattery to obtain from someone knowing the worth of something you already have. It should only be appreciated. That I can say is the best way to look at it because the way you deal with each situation is up to you but you should be flattered over all. This feeling though comes with time. The time you should of took to build security and confidence which ultimately leads you to it.

One thing I can say that was (still is) my button pusher was the dealings with the female friends which I am still working on methods. But I don't think I can ever rest knowing that people ONLY want something they don't have and theres nothing else to it. Which brings us to our inner morals and how they slowly shape around the worlds ideals. The idea that when you associate a man with a women there is really no big deal regardless of the association, he is just being a man. But when a woman is associated with a man be it her boss, a class mate. There will always be an assumption that something is going on. What is considered normal to some I consider sexist. There are many classic morals that I was raised on that I live by and carry through my heart. But there are a few that I want to burn along with racism and the media. The idea that women should be home before the street lights go off and never to work harder then a man just irks my soul. The fact that I am much more vulnerable and less likely to come home then a man is should allow me to accept that I should proabably be in the house before a certain time. But what about the fact that women are much more empowered now, then ever, and its clear that we can hold our own with or without a man. So does this go for everything? Can I sleep with 2 men in one night and be as down as Richie is? Why is it different if I have the same amount of male friends as my partner does? I clearly know the difference but really though what is the difference?

This is a video that my brother showed me a few weeks ago from a sports show.

I wanted to quote them on the topic of sexism and change. They are comparing the mistreatment of Muslim women to American women which I don't believe is comparable at all. Here Bill Maher defends that argument. I do believe that wrong is wrong no matter the degree of progression. Even though it might depend. I think if you are dealing with someone who was raised on that moral code then there is no excuse.

"If you put a knife in my back and pull it out 6 inches, you call it progression but theres still a knife in my back". Malcom X

I feel the same way when it comes to the rights and wrongs in relationships. I can't see your progression if you know what you're doing is wrong in the first place.

Then I always say if women had to trade places with men then they would be in a lot of trouble. I think we are too vain to take on the responsibilities of those that real men take on. I KNOW this and if we had to endure what a man has to from day to day I don't think we would survive. This I say goes both ways and we'll see if men are jealous by nature if put the test. We would see they are unable to walk a day in any woman's stiletto's. But thats why we have men and we have women, to separate the hard jobs upon us.

I would love to see a difference in the way roles are played in relationships. It probably won't happen soon but one thing has to change for another to grow.

Recently

2011-03-20T20:52:00.000-07:00

I don't know what has been taking me so long to get my ass on a stage and perform one of my fierce poems. We know I can stand up in front of a crowd and put on any show. But I don't understand why I have yet to perform one of my own poems. I write some specifically to be performed but yet never get around to doing it. I really need to memorize, practice, and get to audition. Besides the thrill I get from being on stage doing anything there is a sweet satisfaction and accomplishment from performing. Especially something as personal as spoken word which is just you, no music, no props, and no back up dancers. It can be very intimidating if thinking along that track.

I remember how good I felt after performing "Phenomenal Women" by Maya Angelou along with 4 other young ladies from my step team. It was great and I was so pleased that I could do it. It should of brought me to do my own but I never got around to it. That was when I was 14 I believe.

Now I should have no excuses right? I usually find a reason to why I don't exercise all that I have to offer. But really this time I am working on a few and memorizing them as I write. One is about God and frustrating it is when is comes to him answering prayers. At first it was a personal letter that I was going to keep to myself. Then I realized how relatable it is and how fun it would be to play around we something we all do and feel.

My mouth has always been bigger then my stomach and if I didn't know it took 9 months to create a baby. I would be sure that I've been pregnant for as long as I can remember.

Here I am at a cupcake competition at the Katra Lounge which was really nice by the way which was hosted by an organization called "A young Mother's D.R.E.A.M". So being the greedy person I am decided to eat beforehand and still try to indulge on an unlimited amount of cupcakes.

There was so much to choose from with pretty decorations and interesting flavors I decided to take a bite from every one. I'm glad I stop eating so much sugar because it hit me hard with a headache and a follow up tummy ache. There was one that was my favorite though besides being too sweet for my taste buds it was a waffle, cinnamon/sugar cupcake. It made me think of one of my favorite cereals and my special pumpkin spice pancakes (that I only eat and love).

Ignore my chipped nail polish if you can.

a little here and there

2011-03-07T16:26:00.000-08:00

First and foremost I am NOT trying to push you to the side and make another home with someone else. But most of my time has been invested into my new website. There is no reason that I should be getting confused with my own number of blogs and sites, no reason. So for the past month I have been working on a grande website just and solely for Make it Happen. I think it deserves it. I want it to be perfect and everyones main source for everything "make it happen" because if I can't keep up then theres something wrong.

I like having multiple sites because in doubt it reflects who I am in real life; all over the place. And I'm OK with that as long as it has me written all over it. So far though its coming along the way I like it the designing part being the easiest. It was creating a domain name, registering, and transferring it that has been growing gray hairs out of my scalp. I see exactly why web designers make big bucks and why they exist, this process is no joke. Its not something a regular person can figure out (unless we confirm that its just me). Me being me: stubborn and vain I will like to take all the credit and points for the hard work behind the creation. I have went far enough to create every piece in my collection and take part in all designs. Why not the same for the website?

Well I don't have a premiere date but I can say it will be sometime this year I am doing a few touch ups. But still working on the complications that come behind the domain registrar. You will soon be rewarded with new earrings and my best of the best. I will be deleting Wrappedinbows and my Artfire accounts so I can sleep better at night. I will be keeping Christielover because I don't have the heart to delete it or the strength to start over. We have too much history and this is my first, my baby, my original. What kind of person would I be to get rid of the beginning of my life of blogging. I would be a monster thats what.You can still expect to get more info on my life in Philadelphia and New York, more on my personal style, my favorites, my disputes, and my career paths. Also you can still get your inside scoop at WiththePunches and Onsexualpaper.

Here are some recent photos of me playing model and decked out in a new pair of earring/necklace "Primrose"

Are you In?

2011-02-23T21:59:00.000-08:00

I have always been very personal and hands on. I enjoy face to face conversations largely more then text messages and all that non physical contact. I still much rather no one use their phones when we are OUTSIDE and keep those lives separated. This is about social networking and being connected outside of all the falsified "connections". Remember when calling someone was normal and you didn't have to look at your phone and think "what do they want". And remember when you actually met up with your friends instead of receiving random text messages and wall posts.

I just want to know. Are you still normal? Can you convert back to medieval times when we didn't use technology all the way just to keep in touch? I remember when Facebook was mainly used to reconnect with childhood friends and anyone who was not in your day to day life.

Lately I've been rather disgusted with myself and the lack of reading that I haven't been doing. I am a true book worm carrying a book every where I go and never sleeping alone. Theres something about a book that I can't get from a stimulating conversation. I'll choose a book over any form of illustration or print. I read every chance I get and because the internet has decided to take over I'm always reading some article here and there because of that. But a book for me can not be replaced, the smell and all. From this and that and all other excuses I haven't picked up a book in a looonnng time and I was starting to not feel like myself. Doing all this online surfing and even considering buying an E-book which goes against all sorts of religions. But I was just wondering what it would feel like to pick up a book and read words off of a paper and turn a page. I was starting to feel like I wasn't normal anymore.

I thought I was turning into an internet head or something along those lines of that. It was when I picked up "For Colored Girls When The Rainbow Is Enuf" (I know how late am I) that I realize my love went no more. I still love books. LOL!

The feeling made me instantly think of how awkward it is to hang out with someone and instead of replacing our pauses with more conversation. We casually pull out our phones and thats where my problem begins. I have always had a problem with people constantly using their phones as a clutch. But it has become more of a life line and its disturbing. I for one still enjoy sitting in a room full of people and letting our chatter fill up time I am not yet uncomfortable with that. Am I still normal for this? Because it seems as if no one is comfortable with improvised face to face conversation they much rather text me then call me. Or @ me then text me OR direct message me then call me. Theres now ways to judge if someone doesn't want to speak to you in 6 different ways and quit frankly I can't keep up. I just really want to hang out and NOT on oovoo.

I'm just looking for some normality in this digital world of ours and I don't think its going to get any better. Now that our cars will check our FB updates for us there will be no need to open up my laptop or any FB application. Its just getting too out of hand when I can depend on an reply on twitter then a phone call. I'm more confident in getting a response through email because I know thats one of the first things people check when they wake up.

I'm just glad that I can pick up a book after being accustom to scrolling down instead of turning pages. I just want to know why can't people normally hang out like we use to without bringing that other woman (the cellphone). This is just the tip of the iceberg for me and I'm not done and I won't stop until everyones phone is off at the dinner table.

2011-02-23T21:00:00.000-08:00

I did not dress the part for this weekend not only did Friday's beautiful weather misled me to believe in future warm weather. But it confused me and caused me to be cold all weekend. Luckily though I was saved by the wonderful photo shoot that I took part of. It has been my second photo shoot for Make it Happen and a growing experience for me. I realized that I have much more fun behind the scenes then in front of them I am too playful to be a model and it shows in my blueprints. All the pictures I don't put up you can see how unprofessional and silly I am. Theres just no way a modeling career would have worked for me.

At some point we ventured off away from the lighting and the plain backdrop to take some raw photos and they came out beautiful I was very impressed. You can view some of the photos here and here.

Theres only one photographer can shoot me he knows my angles, he catches me at my best, and I can do more wrong and not get in trouble. My pictures don't come out a way on coincidence my personal photographer is just that good.

Well here are a few shots we took before we headed into the photo shoot and I love how my sweater turned me into superwomen.

The shoes I'm wearing were never meant to be worn every day but they have gotten me through a lot of slush, snow, and rain. Never would I have thought these $34.00 wedges from H&M would have survived such brutal treatment. Considering how I treat my new shoes (run them into the ground until I get a new pair) I am shocked that they are still intact. They were brought as a quickie but have become my every day shoes.

hit home

2011-01-18T10:57:00.000-08:00

Hearing music for the first time in the car is the best way for me to listen. I caught on when I heard it on the radio and instantly ran home to download it. Man this song definitely describes my mood and current position. I love it.

From my favorites

2011-01-16T19:41:00.000-08:00

From the best place in the world a few pics from hanging with the best team in the world

Good times indeed!

My pair

2011-01-16T18:25:00.000-08:00

I finally took time out to make myself a few pair of classic and signature earrings. Since I've been hanging with black recently I wore this little number with these long and sexy earring/necklace. I am in love with the length and color I always need to go bigger. My earrings started out being shoulder length to some now waist length and I love it!

They are so wearable and they really made my outfit most times I like complexity but recently as I been venturing into black I have also been calming down my look a little. Only a little bit because there is nothing calm or simple about these earrings. But I love that you see them first and they complete the whole ensemble.

For details on this night go here

Weapons

2011-01-03T07:50:00.000-08:00

I've been trying to find the words to say this. I mean I've been saying it in many different ways but she layed it out well.

Toast to the Firsts

2011-01-03T06:46:00.000-08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!

I'm so happy you guys made it to the new year. I had the safest new year spent inside where I'll wake up knowing where I am. I hope everyone was able to say the same.

I for one do wish I rang in my new year a little better but it is only the beginning and does not determine how my year will end. Like I said before my new year has already started and I have been ready and set to take my life in my own hands. I'm happy that I can truly say that I've learned a lot this past year and I have grown to know myself better. The good, the bad, and the ugly. It's been another year of me growing closer to myself and I am so blessed for that. People go years without knowing who they are and more time spent discovering themselves. I can say I'm blessed to learn more about me every year I spend with myself.

It's been my 3rd year blogging and I'm happy to celebrate it with a post from my first post ever. I started when I moved 2 years ago when I finally got the courage to expose my life online. I wasn't sure how to create a perfect balance of giving enough but not too much. This is my baby and I have learn to cherish every post, every follower, and every month that goes by with it still alive. I was a beginner then not sure how this blogger thing worked and I was very pessimistic about my move. Read on to see what I was doing, where I was going, and how I was thinking? I was new to Philly and had a completly fresh outlook on my move compared to now.

"I'm a new resident in Philly, I was turned off when I had visited last April It felt so far from new york, I was sick and it just was not working for me. So last summer when I found out I was moving to Philly, the anger that built up was incredible. It took me months to get over it, and embrace the blessing. First of all we get a fresh start with EVERYTHING and you just can't go wrong with that."

night 2

"No more tickets, new schools, new travel, new people, new everything. Moving to a completely different location is like pressing restart you can't mess up with a clean slate. I want to actually make a name for myself as a writer as appose to a girl with hair. I love my hair more than life but I have SO much more to offer. My family can get a fresh start and more importantly grow closer with the struggle. The fact that every deli sells subway sandwiches for $4 (hoagies) and the Chinese restaurants sell candy and chips in it just makes no sense. Its so great! I had my first Philly cheese steak last night and what the, it was amazing. I can't stand cheese steak but Philly has me hooked. Once the weather gets warm its a wrap the art and monuments are ridiculous there's always something to see. Being here for 3 days I'm getting a feel of the city and already falling in love. It took us the whole weekend to unload our 26 foot truck, we threw away our microwave and it was gone within the hour. Lmao how could you not love a place like that."

Funny ,funny right now I'm still trying to embrace Philly and trying to make it work for me. Hopefully my posts will be less about Philly bashing and more about me improving. But if you know Philly you know there will be more of that anyway.

Merry Happy

2010-12-28T12:37:00.000-08:00

If I knew I worked a few blocks from the tree for some odd years I would have been all up and down Rockefeller center. Maybe it was the cold that steered me away but I finally went for the first time and like all tourist spots. I was annoyed like no other. I thought it was much bigger and I assumed it was more grand. Luckily it wasn't as cold as other nights and I was relatively comfortable so I was down for a nice walk.

I like happy endings and this day ended happy

To read on my Christmas and Eve go here

But HE'S my "friend"

2010-12-28T11:09:00.000-08:00

I've always felt like women were suppose to be so much closer to each other then to men. By default we share similar qualities; not including that we all have breasts and go through an equal amount of hell each month. But we all fight if not a few but a whole lot of the same struggles between our reputation as sex symbols and our fight to be treated equal to man. We are so close its disgusting which is why its so mind boggling that women get along better with men regardless of men's always slogan "bros over hos". I didn't know women were still getting past this catty BS and still feuding over nothing, I really didn't know that. Its very frustrating to feel like as whole people have over came something you being completely and for the movement to only realize we still have a long way to go. As women we have got to do better treating each other like the next enemy and acting as if we can't get along is unnecessary. If I can express my anger I have toward women who eliminate other women in their life and claim to get along with men better. I would do some damage if I could express that angry.

Witnessing others with relate-able struggles and culture background similarities come together and get along just based off principle. Has made me think even harder about calling the next women my sister, just on principle. I was raised in a way to treat everyone semi like family but growing older I see its more important to stress that with someone you can relate to. Why not? Why not support, befriend, or simply speak to someone you relate you? WHY NOT? When it comes to a similar hate we have for someone we do not hesitate to talk and compare how much we don't like someone or something. So why not use that same energy when it comes to everything? It would make for a better world if we used anything to be positive with someone else.

See I've been having a problem at work even with me being friendly I didn't realize THIS was a bridge I had to cross. I didn't know this was still going on. It seems like the females at my job are having a really hard time getting along with each other. Let me add that I have never worked at a place with so many cool people of course theres the selective jerk offs but very few the majority of the employees are good people. As the months go by I've watched the females and males pair up as if they have labor pains to talk about. It just doesn't add up why does this have to be so hard. Men have NO problems when it comes to befriending each other well not obvious ones and there always personal. Before I even get to know a female before I even have a conversation with her it seems like theres an already built road block. What exactly distracts us from becoming closer and building a relationship as easy as it is or is suppose to be. I found it to be very awkward after a few conversations its hard to get to the "next level". OK maybe its me maybe this will make sense if I throw out all the variables. Maybe their shy, maybe they don't like my personality, maybe I'm speaking too soon and I'm not giving it enough time, maybe I'm just over analyzing it. But what stems my frustration is when I see how close a female becomes with a male in a matter of weeks. We've met around the same time and had the same opportunities. So where did we go wrong which wrong turn did us women make that men end up on the right path. I need to figure this out or I'm going to go crazy.

I don't like the fact that women are so quick to call a man her friend no matter how obvious it is that he wants one thing (and friendship not being it). Its so hard to past that barrier that us women put up as a defense mechanism. I'm speaking because I watch and experience this and also practice it. So I know first hand how stand offish women are (I'm only stand-offish to the male species though). For guys their use to it so they know how to play the game and they have more patience when it comes to this. But I don't get it I'm not trying to get in any womens pants any time soon so why is she playing hard to get with me lol. Whats with the attitude like I'm the man trying to get your number shouldn't their be a different approach when it comes to the same sex (obviously women are backwards). I just want to say to the females that NO he is not your friend sorry to break it to you. At the end of the day if you did decide to initiate something more then that then he wouldn't hesitate to obliged. Think about that! I'm not saying to discriminate I'm just saying to be a little more careful who you call your friends. Stop being lazy and spark up a conversation with the female in the room. Instead of going the easy way out and interacting with the very flirtatious guy in your face. It's going to be a gamble whichever way you choose.

writers delight

2010-12-28T10:29:00.000-08:00

Micro sculptures by Dalton Ghetti

Born in Brazil Dalton does not use pencils to draw out his visions his pencils are his platform. With a whole lot of patience he creates intricate designs using the tips of the pencil, using a razor blade, sewing needle and a knife. Dalton takes fine art to another level.

I am in love with the detail and the dedication. I can only imagine how frustrating it is to mess up a pencil, having to start all over because of miscalculated measurements. I'm just angry when I break a pencil the cramps he must get in his hands man I salute him.

You can view more of his work here

Five Things That Instantly Relax me

2010-12-06T11:30:00.000-08:00

At times like this I need quick remedies to loosen me up there has to be things I can be able to do to calm me down. Or else! If I can't relax then I am ultimately doomed. Im not rich so I can't just call off of work, I can't ask someone to take over my errands, and I can't put a pause on life. So with those things not being available to me I know I need to have my own quick fixes. When I'm stressed and under pressure what can I do now to fix it...

Driving Last year when I was going through it I loved taking that long drive to my sisters house in the boondocks. It always calmed me down by default being that I was alone and wasn't forced to asnwer to anyone. Recently I've been having THE worst time of my life and driving has been one of the top things that keeps me sane. I love love blasting my music and ignoring everyone around me. Sometimes it depends on my actual mood but its not limited to. I decide whether its a 80 mph drive or a 40 mph drive. I like to drive like Ms. Daisy but for the most part when I'm in no rush I love to speed. I am truly at a piece of mind when I'm on the road especially when its a really long drive nothing compares to it.

Writing/Blogging This also depends on my mood but isn't limited to. I use to write everyday I mean a day didn't go by without me writing an entry to my journal or a chapter to a recent story. I was always writing some story but after having about 100 it's so hard to keep up. Now I have turned to blogging and I have a few. I love it I really do. I wish I always had the energy to write because most of the time when I start I can't stop. All it takes is one thought and next thing you know I'm on Tumblr cooking up a rant then after that I'm inspired to finish my many drafts on blogger or create a new post. I love that when I start I feel like I can't stop I just go on a writing frenzy from blog to blog. The constant typing may be a melody to my ears and the cramp I get in my hands only make me want to continue. Most of the time I can spend hours on end blogging and I always get a peace of mind from it. I get to free my mind of sub thoughts from the past weeks I feel burdened because I know I have neglected an idea of mine or a thought. So when I finally put it down and complete it I feel so at ease maybe its sort of a guilt thing. At the end of the day it makes me feel good that someone is out there reading my thoughts, someone is more then interested in what I have to say. I'm so blessed to be able to express myself naturally because that doesn't come easily to everyone. I only have writers block by default because I ALWAYS have something to say (maybe thats a bad thing lol). Push come to shove writing and blogging are my runner up outlets of relaxation if I can't do either of the two when I want I just might go crazy.

Eating I take advantage of the fact that obesity is not in my genes. I look at my mother and see she doesn't eat like a health freak and is not in the gym everyday. Yet at 57 her body is crazy and she can run anyone 26-40 for their money. Seeing my dad also is in VERY good health and shape for his age I just know that I'm in good hands. I figure why not enjoy life as it is I try not to eat like a mad women but damn food for being so comforting. Most of the time I eat as a hobby just to be able to say I'm hungry allows me to make a mad dash for the fridge. Sholas grandmother says "If you don't know where your money went then you probably ate it". If thats not true then I don't know what is. When I eat something thats unnecessary I'm relaxed in the sense that I know I won't gain weight no matter how wrong this is. I won't have heart problems no matter how much I take in. As I write I realize how stupid I may sound but I can't deny what relaxes me and I'd be lying if I say eating doesn't.

Cleaning Theres some sort of refreshment I receive in knowing that everything is cleaned up and its the last thing that I have to worry about. On top of that I just like to clean since I was little it was something I would do after I got into an argument or after I finished crying. I would randomly start to clean up. Then I figured I was going to do it no matter what happens but now I realize its a reaction my body has to emotion. I mean I literally will begin cleaning within seconds of crying. Just like people who bite their nails find comfort within the act they could be thinking of nothing, angry, or even happy. As soon as that emotion hits them so does the nail biting. I am the same way with cleaning I now know that I use it as comfort and it works like a charm. I remember I use to say to people if you need someone to clean your house, start an argument with me, then invite me over. It was stupid but so true. I also love to be surrounded by cleanliness I feel like when everything is cluttered and messy its so much harder to think. Its easier to breath when the air is clean and when your angry the last thing you want to worry about is a big mess.

Scrap-booking Lately I haven't gotten the chance to scrap book but when I do I'm going to scrap to hell out of my newest pictures. I really love memories and I love the idea of creating memories with loved ones and even strangers. I know on my worst days I like to sit down on my bedroom floor with my most recent photos gathered, all my scrapbooks, paper, and stickers surrounding me. And I just scrapbook all day I can be locked up for hours and when I come out I will be a different person. I will not only be calm but I'll be much happier.

Its just nice having more then one outlet that you can depend on. Making earrings makes me feel accomplished like I'm moving forward so depending on the day this makes me extremely relaxed. Talking puts me at ease too but I think thats everybody and also understanding. I don't know what it is about coming to terms with someone that just makes my day. I hate misunderstandings more then anything so clearing things up takes a burden off my shoulders which also relaxes me instantly.

With the Punches

2010-11-23T00:20:00.001-08:00

If you haven't yet I would appreciate the love but follow or just check out my other blog HERE where you can learn more about me and my many layers.

I cheat on some post using some material from here but hey its so hard keeping up

Nudity and opening up

2010-11-18T22:03:00.000-08:00

To write this post I know that I had to open up a little, more then I was willing to but for the sake of a post I had to do it. If you didn't know I have a blog on Tumblr one of the most raw sites that I know about (now it's an over flood of people who only post pictures). I remember when I first discovered Tumblr I was so amazed with the nudity and how open the site was to it that was really my main attraction. Now I don't walk around with a sign and most of the time I don't even talk about it. I like to think of sexuality as something that should come off of you and not something you need to shout out so people will know. I have always been a free spirit I couldn't hide that if I tried from the way I speak my mind, how, and when. To my mindset on life in general and my own freedom in the way I live. I can be free because I free myself on what people think of me that is barely my business. Even if I cared enough to watch what I do and say I still couldn't be sure what someone was thinking, it's too much out of my control. On top of being a free spirit I am very sexual and completely comfortable with my body . Actually since I was a little girl its always been an early discovery. It's not something I talk about to add onto introductory's but if you know me or just meet me for the first time it's not something that has to be said out loud. I think my sexuality bleeds off of me and that's why there is no need to shout it out and throw it at the world. It's the same with being independent, no one needs to hear it if that is what you are then we will see it. I sometimes hate that there are so many layers to me it may take someone years just to know something as simple as my life goals. I have too much to share and theres so much to be to discovered it's so impossible to get to every inch. I'm too busy laughing and joking to get that that part of me.

Follow (I Love Being Black )

I use to joke and say if being in public naked was legal then I would not hesitate to strip down. Because of my father I love my body I was born in such a free spirited home what was deemed inappropriate in other homes was only accepted in mine. I'm not saying we walked around naked I'm just saying shorts shorts and a tank top wasn't the worst attire. Still though growing up where nudity was not only welcomed it was encouraged to be comfortable in your own skin. I managed to not broad coast it all over the internet and not let a day down without reminding someone how comfortable I am. To start my rant I HAD to come clean with who I really am ;] especially being that so many people are coming out the closet with their own "sexual comfortability" . Now I use quotations because I don't really see it that way just because you are secure in yourself and just because you love your body. Doesn't make it right to share it with the world. Now I'm going to be honest I have no idea why I started to write this post a paragraph in I forgot what my inspiration was to begin writing. I know somewhere along the lines I signed into Tumblr and was bombarded with soft porn not that it shocked me. It is indeed 1:30 in the morning and I would be a fool to expect anything else from Tumblr, somewhere along the lines though something hit a nerve. It's not that I follow more then 4 nude blogs and not that I can't actually scroll through Tumblr in public for fear of a raunchy photo appearing. It's the misconception of nudity that is starting to blow my mind, for you to understand where I stand in the equation. I had to open up and explain how I feel about it and where I stand in-between . I love it. I would choose nudes over porn ANY day I love the art of it, the exchange of flesh, the comfort level, and more importantly the pureness of it. No clothes, nothing to hide under but your own skin. I appreciate it and expose it in the privacy of my own home. Theres nothing attractive or cool about raunchy raunchiness it's unnecessary and theres nothing "artistic" about letting it all hang out its just that; letting it all hang out. I feel like being unreal about nudity takes away the beauty of it its not real anymore if your're not real. Theres nothing beautiful behind the thought of something being portrayed because of insecurities, missing gaps, and your own misconstrued ideas. Now I'm putting most nudity in the same box because most of it is the same but there is a big difference between tastefully raunchy and just plain filthy. I myself don't mind either I would just rather there be less of one. As a person who enjoys going commando under my summer dresses and has more then enough reblogged nudes on her own blog I can vouch and speak up. I just want to keep it clean so we can keep spreading the love.

Coming Soon...

2010-11-15T19:19:00.000-08:00

I love taking 2-3 days off in a row it's a beautiful thing. I can relax and indulge in doing nothing on a Monday how many people do you know that can do that. There is nothing like a day full of nothing to get a chance to catch up from a fast pace week or just life in general. I take FULL advantage of those days happily laying in bed rotting. But apart of my long days off I finally stumbled upon The Sea I don't know why I wasn't aware of this place. But seeing that its so cheap its disappointing to know I've been missing out for so long. If you haven't been or heard of The Sea it's a Thai restaurant in Williamsburg not only is it a place you will want to hang around because of how beautifully and carefully decorated it is. You're not going to want to stop eating, well I didn't I just love discovering a place that makes me want to spend my money lol because that is rare. Whatever you do make sure you at least Google it to read up on comments to see if I'm lying. You can check out the pictures below and see how happy I am.

After being against them I finally got with them and wore them the right way. Here's my debut lol from my favorite place in the whole wide world (before it was a lot of folks favorite place) my leather leggings from Zara

Looking over at my November archive's makes me so sad the fact that I do have SO much to say I wonder why its not reflecting through my blog. I have a few drafts that I'm confident and excited about, very lengthy posts about For Colored Girls and women and their "I get along with men better" mindset. From work to reading up on my blogs there is a lot boiling up in my little head I don't want to make any promises but soon enough I'll get that two to a three.

Just the first of new earrings to come you can buy these HERE

Also look out for my special clearance sale; out with the old and in with the new, earrings will be going for as low as $5.00. Theres a few of my single feather earring that I have left over that are sitting and waiting patiently to be worn. I feel so wrong seeing them sit around not getting a chance so I marked them as low as can be so someone will own them. While doing so I will be adding more beautiful colors that are coming your way so just check in and out with the shop within the next couple of weeks for more sales.

City Lights

2010-11-01T00:01:00.000-07:00

If I haven't been sleeping I've been working and if I'm not indulging in those two then I'm trying to recollect myself. I hate the idea of working to live or working more then living. I'm hoping this is temporary because there is no way I can survive without the little things. I was never about chasing the almighty dollar just to have it the image on T.V and the American dream do not fascinate me. I hate the idea of people running after the highest pay or going to school so they can get a great job. I think when you run after somethings that are unlimited the high will eventually die down. Like what happens when you do become rich and you worked your ass off to make sure you won't have to work for nothing. But now what, you just live? I always felt like money was the wrong thing to chase or dream of because of what it CAN'T do. By default of course we don't want to struggle and of course we should work toward being comfortable. But when being rich becomes your goal you will always run into a dead end when you realize that that's all it is. I have so many other plans my money will just be extra.

I can't wait to be really settled in my own place I hate not being comfortable or separated from my sanctuary. I need to be able to depend on a peaceful environment that I can truly call my own. I can't wait to end this run around in my mind and literally with my travel. I can't wait to give my job more credit (I do in fact have the best one in the world if you didn't know). They buy us pizza and cupcakes just because. I don't want to argue every other day from being all over the place because I need to be settled. I need my own kitchen, the best closet, and a bomb ass working area. I throughly enjoy making earrings but it's not a coincidence that I haven't posted one in weeks. Those things WILL make this process so much easier. I don't want to fall apart I want to stay focused and live. Its been about 2 months and I'm getting more impatient then I'm suppose to be.

This is the first time I've worn stockings in the past month; its so sad. I brought these from a young lady in Soho for $20. I could not deny the art or the unique idea. I have never seen anything like them and I was blown out of my mind. When I first seen them on her I actually thought they were tattoos when she told me they were stockings I was more thrown off by the price. Now if you've been reading carefully you know that I barely want to pay that amount for a shirt (a nice one at that) she obviously didn't know me. She told me she screen prints them herself and I was in awe I am much more prone to support an artist then a commercial store. Especially if I relate to their hustle I asked her if she made any sales and I felt for her when she said no. With that I purchased them happily knowing there isn't a large amount being passed around and I can be confident in knowing that they are rare.

I won't apologize for my lack of posting but I will say sorry for not having creative and diverse poses. I'm not good when it comes to that department I'm actually terrible my blooper pictures are the worst. But I'm sorry I really try my best ;[

I'll be the one to say it

2010-10-18T22:51:00.000-07:00

I don't want to beat around the bush with this and make drawn out excuses before I plead my case. I shouldn't have to say I think Willow Smith is creative and talented. I don't want to go into the hater syndrome or the I-am-the-smart-black-women-speaking-the-truth speach. We already know shes blessed and have a gift so now that we have that cleared up I'm going to go right into it.

The music industry is not kid friendly and it will never be, there is not an area made for children because Disney is not exactly PG anymore. Theres no such thing as censors and there damn sure aren't any for kids. Nothing in the entertainment business are for children anymore, putting your child on T.V is single-handedly signing away their childhood while throwing them to the wolfs. No one is safe no Justin Beiber no not even sweet Taylor Swift was wrapped in a child safety jacket. They are all thrown to the fire when admitted in and I think it's unfair, selfish, and irresponsible.

I hate the fact that Willow Smith is famous and I hate the fact that she will only get more famous. I wish she didn't sound older then she was I think then she wouldn't get so much recognition. I hate that she's the daughter of the very lovable and famous Jada Pinkett and Will Smith , that helps her case too much. And last but not least I hate that she is 9 years old and already with a bangin' hit and a bangin' video (the same video I added to my YouTube favorites). I'll try not to justify too much but only explain.

Ever since the Bow Wows and Miley Cyrus I have ALWAYS hated young teens and kids in the music industry. I always thought it was the fastest path to a child's destruction. Willow is only 9-years old and is packing talent as naturally as it comes to most black children but why so soon is what I ask? Imagine what kind of creative juices will be flowing by the time she is 18 she will not only dance and sing better. But she will be much more prepared then she is now no matter how mature she is no one can convince me that she can handle an adult life because the bottom line is. She is not an adult. Point blank.

I've listened to her speak and to be honest I didn't expect anything less I wasn't looking forward to seeing a young girl with a cute little voice. I was grateful to see she was a 9-year old with a head on strong and a mother guiding her through every step.

But this is not like puberty, a bad break-up, or hard knock life tribulations (moments our mothers wish we don't have to go through). This is not a stage she has to pass through to prove something as a girl this is something her mother can not assist her though with every step. Of course when your're crying your eyes out after (what you thought was the love of your life) he kicked you to the curb your mother wishes you didn't have to go through it. But no matter how many tissues are passed YOU still are going through the heart-ache your mother can't feel the pain for you. So to me no matter how close their relationship is it can not get her through what its going to do to her as a child. Before I knew Willow was missing school for fashion shows I stood by my case but that only made me feel more strongly about it. All the money in the world can not catch up on the lessons she missed in school, sure she can study but why does she have to catch up when that; school, should be the number one priority at that age. What else can she offer us (her audience and fans) a hit in the club a place where shes not old enough to enter.

I personally don't think it's the right path a parent should take it will only put a ring of fire around her and her child. One that is not necessary and could be avoided music isn't going any where and neither is her talent so what's the rush? I'm going to stand by what I believe is a mistake and only hope it's stopped before this poor girl is put in special ed.

I love my hair

2010-10-13T22:07:00.000-07:00

It's 2010 and Sesame Street is just now getting the hint lol oh ok. Better late then never right.

But I couldnt pass this without sharing with you guys it definitely made me smile.

fresh face

2010-10-07T17:06:00.000-07:00

I have a habit of cutting my hair when I'm going through some thing. It doesn't have be a serious occurrence as long as its something that creates frustration, angry, or sadness. I use it as an opportunity to locate the clippers. Since I got my first buzz cut in 08' (I had to go to my Myspace to look at old photos) I began cutting my hair so nonchalantly its become a hobby. Its more then safe to say that I'm most confident and feel the sexiest the shorter my hair. I've become so accustom to it but I'm glad I discovered "my look" at a young age and not 10 years from now. This particular cut I've never had before but it feels so familiar it feels like my hair was suppose to look like this years ago. But enough yapping this is me... Niia Long.

Pt One; Imperfections that I take pride in

2010-10-06T19:26:00.000-07:00

We all have them and are ashamed of most. But I like to walk around with them on my sleeve, literally. Most of my imperfections that some will cringe at I laugh and except them as perfections. For instance...

It doesn't matter if it happens after I leave my house or I notice it before I put my clothes on. When it comes to stains and rips on my clothes I could care less. Maybe I'm tacky or a bit dirty but I just can't care. I'll be honest most of my stains happen during the day I don't know when I became so sloppy but I spill everything on myself. Which is also another imperfection I take pride in. Of course I avoid clothes with obvious stains and too big of holes but if I happen to miss it I hoping everyone else will. I ride on the fact that I'm not homeless and I don't dress like a bum (lol well I don't think I do). But I use that for justification, if my outfit is nice then this stain should not matter lmao. It sounds terrible in print and I feel terrible writing it but its best to be able to laugh at your flaws and imperfections. Then to judge yourself. I already have homeless people doing that for me.

I am way too raw. This is a pro and con but it can be seen as an imperfection. I'm not the friend that will lie to you or sugar coat things. I won't make something seem the way its not. You can not count on me for that, sorry. I take so much pride in the fact that I'm not a liar. It may hurt sometime that I'm not the friend to come to for sympathy but I am more OK with being the friend of truth. I may love that more then hate it but I do see it as an imperfection most of the time. It ties into me being stubborn and not knowing how to flex. I wasn't brought up that way my parents taught their kids to have rough skin. Of course cry when you need to but try to do it as little as possible. There should be no such thing as mourning it's simply a waist a time. It was the way I was raised which can be terminal in many ways. I can lose friends this way and not be able to gain some. I can help someone but I can also hurt someones feelings.

I bite my skin. A habit I haven't let go yet but I take pride in this because I've allowed my nails to grow. It's like, "so what if I still bite my skin I have nails now. And what."

I have many many laughs but most of them are quit obnoxious. Although my laugh may make people feel good if your not apart of my joke then my laugh is not welcoming. I have a very loud laugh that would not work well in the library or even in a large crowd. I have that kind of laugh that makes you wonder, what the hell is so funny because it couldn't possible be that funny. On top of that I find almost everything funny so I'm heard often. I've learn to accept it as annoying but still laugh as loud as I can when I want.

I have no eyebrows. I'm not proud of this at all but I sport it like nobodies business. Its best to say if their not done or if I'm looking like Oscar the grouch then I'll live. Its just not that serious. I remember hating my full thick eyebrows that I inherited from my father. I was too young to get them waxed and no one had $10.00 to fix what wasn't broken. (I actually never paid over $5.00 to get my eyebrows done I just can't pay someone to do something I can do). I thought I was cursed and punished but little did I know I would be begging for eyebrows almost a decade later.

I'm cheap. I inherited this from my parents and it's NOT fun it comes in handy but its crippling sometimes. I can't do anything because I can't get over the price which is pretty sickening. When I need to spend a particular amount I make it a hard task. I adore Dollar Tree and value discounts and sales. Its hard for me to appreciate something well made when I'm so cheap. I would rather pay a dollar for a jacket lol and that's sad. I'm pretty much corrupt when it comes to that area. What I do take pride in is I know where to get any and everything for cheaper. Ask me and I PROMISE I can get the same thing wither it be clothes, shoes, household items,cosmetics I GOT YOU. I know all the best spots, I know the areas, and I know the tricks. Call me and I will have that information for you.

I'm the person in the house creating most of the dishes. Yes its me! Sure I might wash the large load at the end of the week. But I was too lazy to wash every dish I used. I'm sorry I caused so much trouble.

These are only a few misfortunes. I made them sound pretty funny and almost cute but in real life. They become serious issues. I rather brag about them and laugh at myself then get all bent out of shame for no reason at all. Make a list of all your imperfections and flaws then find a way to spin them around to be funny. If you can easily laugh at yourself then you are one step closer to loving yourself more. And that is always a good thing.

Remember

2010-09-27T16:14:00.000-07:00

I remember this was one of my favorite performances. I remember owning a Best of Michael Jackson tape and watching it with my siblings over and over. I mean we were glued to the T.V rewinding each video at least 3 times. I'm surprised we didn't mess up the V.C.R. I hate that I can't express how much of a fan I was it won't seem real. So many people were suddenly in love with him after he died so his real fans were over shadowed. But anyway this performance definitely is one of the all time best.

In 2007 Pink Diamonds gave an interpretation of Remember the Time our coach who was an ALL TIME Michael fan choreographed most of the show. Thought I should share.

Battle in the Apple, 2nd place winners

Real friends and benefits

2010-09-23T22:08:00.000-07:00

I was having a debate on twitter earlier this week. Well I was expressing a theory or technique of mine lol when it comes to distancing from your childhood friends. My theory is to strait cut them off well obviously it depends on the friendship and how its working. But I'm talking about the ones that have tension involved because of disagreements, theres a strain on the relationship because of differences, or even worst that friend that mocks your growth. I'm not saying you need to sit down and make a list or even attack the situation head on. I just think we should be REAL conscious of those friends that linger past their due date. Sometimes being friends for so long really turns an avoidable situation into an in-avoidable bad habit. So assume I'm talking about the old friends that you've already grown apart from, the friend who doesn't understand your life goals, the friend who can only relate to old school memories and nothing else. If you ever felt like your downgrading talking to this friend then that's the one I'm gearing toward. Well in my opinion those friends are no good, not them personally just what they become after life has set us apart. I don't think I'm cold or heartless because I can do this it really takes a strong individual to let go. And a stronger one to see it as life and not as a loosing game. Why sugar coat whats already going to happen, make it easier by taking matters into your own hands. Why let a friendship soil because you want to try and save it after you realize you were done and over with. If you can apply this to a relationship then you see it's the same thing. If you see that a relationship isn't working out and your growing apart and your differences are effecting the relationship eternally then it's time to evaluate things. If you've realized all of this why would you continue to have sex, hang out, and talk after hours. Trying to continue an ending relationship will only cause more harm to it. It leaves no room to come back later if that happens to happen. This goes for friendships also, if you are starting to see patterns that you don't like things will only bring your friendships to its demise and not a growth spur like you want. Then its's time to let go which is always easier said done.

Today I only have a few friends from my childhood one being because most of my friendships didn't last past junior high school. All of my best friends found a way to cut me off by 11th grade or dismiss me all together. Since I was younger I have always went by this I always tried to rid of toxic friendships before they got worst. I was always worried about not creating enemies when that was something I couldn't control. I have had my share of ups and downs with friends trying to recollect damage and hold onto something that already was let go. I always had trouble cutting off friends which is why I could never reminisce with them today. Maybe I shouldn't call it a theory or a technique I don't deal with life like that so I should come up with a different way to describe it. I cherish and love my friends and family. I hold onto them for dear life when I realize how valuable they are. I take my well being and growth very seriously which is why I try to keep positive people around at all times. When your all about positivity its easier for us to grow together. Thats why I grade so harshly when it comes to people in my life I consider them a village raising and watching me. Of course I have full responsibility over me but the way I see it is if your not a strong solider you will not be able to survive in my life's war. I advise everyone to go by this because when you have positive people in return you have a better life.

This was the "outfit" from that day. I have never been so accustom to jeans and a tank, its quick and easy. and since I'm living out of a box for now. It's the first thing I grab so heres a few snap shots of how this outfit "turned" out.

Take a look at my eyebrows running away from me. They always decide to leave me on the best days :{

Also if you peeped my earrings you can buy them here

Day 29/30

2010-09-23T21:25:00.000-07:00

In this past month, what have you learned/Who are you?

I've learned to trust myself more. What came with that was trusting others but before that I had to really believe in my thoughts and opinions. I've learned to live with the thought of me being wrong because the cost of putting trust into myself is worth regret. I learned that its very OK to be unsure but sure, it's OK to walk with a blind fold thats see-through, and it's OK to believe lies that you know are truths. I'm very OK with being told I'm wrong, not that it was an issue before but only on huge life decisions that I HATE to be wrong on. I mean I hate it. In the past month I've learn to let my feelings feel because theres no reason in hiding them. And I also learned to forgive a little better, especially the people that matter. I've learn to never turn my back on anyone who is here for good. I've learn to ignore what my mind and heart says and just try and do whats right. I use to think of ways to make others and myself happy I recently learned how impossible it is to please someone else. I can't go out of my way while making myself unhappy just for someone else. That is unfair and I refuse to live that way.

I am Rebekah the one who will tell you the truth even if it jeopardizes my relationship with someone. I love to learn and I love to share what I know. I am competitive at heart but I try not to be. I just downloaded tap tap and as soon as I'm good enough I'm going to beat Shola's score. I know when to give up but I can't stand loosing an argument or a debate. Actually I won't lose I'll never stop talking even if it means that I'm wrong. I will defend my case until you see my point a little or until you get tired of talking because I won't. I promise. I love to talk. I try to talk to everyone but I'm starting to realize employees and random shoppers might not want to talk to me while their busy. I am so very sensitive but you will never know that because you'll never see. I put my foot in my mouth but since I'm too stubborn to admit I'm wrong I like to keep it there. I never care what people think I mean I really don't care not to say positive things don't count. But all negative and irrelevant thoughts about me from someone else mean nothing. Its almost impossible for me to care what people think. I am daughter,girlfriend,sister,aunt, and a best friend. I am a blogger .
I think I'm more funny then anyone else I can depend on myself to laugh. I'm too hard on myself sometimes I bring myself to tears. But in the end I am my best audience and my biggest fan.

Imperfections

2010-09-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

I had such a lovely week. I've come to the conclusion that I talk too damn much I have this habit of stating the obvious too soon. I was doing so much complaining, crying, and worrying I never got a chance to let things settle in. I was talking about how broke, hungry, and bored I was for one day. Then had a blast, full course meals, and fun the next week. I promise to shut my mouth closed and speak when necessary.

This is me the other day sporting a jumbo pair of hoops. I have never been a fan of hoop earrings (only on myself). I always hated the way they looked and never thought I could get away. Its funny I went from no size to XL. But I am really feeling these since I stole them from my sister. I plan to play with them until I want to wear my own.

Day 28

2010-09-15T20:29:00.000-07:00

A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?

September 2009

I was going to a barbecue that day. One of those short weekends I would spend in New York that never seemed to last too long. At the time I was a bit lost well maybe compared to now. I wasn't very sure of where I was going and how I was going to get there. I always remember being able to see my life in the next year, plan out how it could play out, and be comfortable with letting life live. But I wasn't doing much well on my scale of "doing much" I wasn't doing anything. I was too casual about my life then.

I didn't see traveling back and fourth between cities in my future. Philly was not at all in my agenda especially when I visited a year before I moved there. I had no idea it would become a permanent home.

September 2010

I feel myself on a path and doing what I love to do most; grow and progress. It doesn't matter what is going on as long as I feel and see progression then I'm good. Within my life and see steps toward my life goals then I'm OK. I do not pressure myself. I refuse. I have T.V, parents, friends, and the success of others doing that for me. I have to be the one to say, "your're doing alright Rebekah". Right now compared to last year I'm much more sure with myself but weirdly more sensitive. I'm always on edge now as far as then when I let things rock. I may be more uptight and stern but I think I need that even if I'm being a drama queen. The only person you can depend on to encourage you is you and I was so lazy about it last year. I did step my game up a little from what I thought was OK and frankly where I was last year was not OK.

Day 27

2010-09-15T20:28:00.000-07:00

Why are you doing this 30 day challenge

I've been wanting to do it for awhile I just wanted to do it when I was comfortable. Now I'm OK and more then ready to share myself so doing the 30 day challenge only made sense. Through out my blog there are small pieces of me but the challenge allowed new followers to get to know me. And allow old followers to pick up on anything they have missed. I wanted to do it also for friends, family, and strangers who don't visit my blog. I was very hesitant with linking my blog to my facebook but I have only gotten good feedback in return. I didn't realize that I would be writing letters to people who never get a chance to hear what I have to say. I don't mind letting my loved ones know what they mean to me, that is not a problem. It seemed so perfect at the time I'm so sad that it's coming to an end.

Day 26

2010-09-15T20:27:00.002-07:00

What you think about your friends

I love and adore all of them in a special way. They are all so different its hard to talk about them as a whole. I try to keep productive and positive people in my life and so far I've been blessed with just that. I have very supportive and loving friends, they are my very own village. From different generations and zodiac signs I have the best of a few worlds. My friends are from completely different neighborhoods, come from different backgrounds, and have different morals. What they do share is independence all of them have that I-take-care-of -myself- lifestyle. While also having that "my friends and family are the most important to me" attitude. I have very patient and logical friends. I don't have to call them every day so they know we're on good terms. Good friends know that a fight is nothing but a bump in the road and nothing permanent. I can not stand people who hold grudges and let their feelings get the best of them. I have the kind of friends that will always stay in contact even if we're out of contact. They understand that we both have lives and don't need to cling at the waist. The people I call my friends are the ones I would invite to my wedding 10- 20 years from now. My friends are all keepers.

Autumn's here

2010-09-15T20:20:00.000-07:00

Theres new items up in the shop. Check them out!

Day 24

2010-09-15T20:07:00.000-07:00

A letter to your parents

Dear distant parents,

I wish I knew exactly how you felt because then maybe it would be easy to write to you. I will start by saying that your words do not add up with your actions. Well not to me at least. You might think you lead by example but you don't I don't understand why you expect me to follow in your lead when your not sure if you want to go in that direction. I would love to make you happy and please you but I don't believe I was brought into this world to settle your soul. Yeah I'm trying my best not to be "disrespectful" like you say but you have to expect me to think differently sooner or later. Theres no way you thought that we would always follow and listen to your every word. At some point we all have to grow up sometime and think for ourself. Its sad to think that me being happy isn't good enough, because your not happy with my decisions so how I feel is irrelevant. I can't live a life where pleasing myself is wrong, being selfish is unheard of, and taking care of me and only me is pretty much forbidden. I want to say I'm OK but you would probably feel better if I said that next to you. I will say I'm not doing drugs and I haven't robbed a bank, just yet. I know you think I'm stupid but really at this point what you think doesn't matter. I can't strive to please you I will never get any where in life because what you think is OK is completely different from my OK. I'm not trying to be a rebel I just want to be happy. All I want to do is be happy.

For Colored Girls

2010-09-15T11:11:00.001-07:00

Its very possible that I have bad taste in movies. Or you might not agree with what I think is good. I just would like to know what is all this I hear about people doubting Tyler Perry. I feel like the only who's defending him. No one, I mean no one seems to think he is worth the breath or has any sort of talent. Are you seeing what I'm seeing. Again maybe I have bad taste but I think Tyler Perry is a wonderful director and writer. Who are all these people that disagree. I mean the things I hear about Tyler him are ridiculous, so much for supporting each other. Its not all about rooting for him just because hes black but its about rooting for him because he is standing alone. I happen to think his movies are dynamite I don't understand how people can damn him off completely. They seem to only highlight his OK movies are the worst actors instead of shining light on what was decent.

I just watched the trailer for his new movie For Colored Girls and I don't expect anything less of great for the movie. It seems like half the world is scared of him being behind it including Clutch. Someone needs to point out his crappy writing because I don't see it. Maybe it has to do with the fact that he's one of the biggest black directors who are bringing in major black productions. This reason alone makes it so easy to critic every detail of his work. I want to give his critics the benefit of the doubt but most of them are black and since black people have a bad track record of hating on each other hard then their benefit will only go so far.

I know I'm not the only one who got chills.

Is there something wrong with supporting someone because their from the same background. Come from the same country, or has the same culture as you. Is it wrong to support them just on those things?

Of course we omit rapist , murderers, and thieves obviously we're not including people who have only bad intentions. But if you want to support a stranger who goes through the same thing you go through. Do you? Just because you can relate to them. Do you think that's wrong?

I see other cultures come together NO MATTER WHAT. From there to here I see races work together just on principle with no if, ands, or buts. But for some reason we; have had a hard time supporting each other through thick and thin. I get if your not fond of someones work but Tyler Perry is obviously not trying to ridicule and embarrass anyone. Its pretty apparent his goal and work is only for the greater good. So why is his work hated on so hard? What did he ever do to you why can't you see hes only trying to help.

Eye Candy

2010-09-14T20:01:00.000-07:00

A few photos from my first time at Fashion's Night Out. I didn't get a chance to focus on my outfit so much. I was more excited in the "event" itself. Since I was moving that same weekend my clothes were limited. I had a good time over all even though it was mostly standing around. You can stay tuned for a detailed post on Withthepunches.

fly lady Macy

(lol I look so out of place)

If you peeped my earrings and your interested you can buy them here

Day 23

2010-09-13T15:43:00.000-07:00

Something you crave a lot

Quesadillas
I've always been a burrito lover. I cherish my Qdoba card for points. I search out for the best burrito between local Mexican restaurant. Lately all it's been doing is hitting the spot.

Day 22

2010-09-12T15:43:00.000-07:00

What makes you different from everyone else

Well instead of having an idol I am my own pioneer. I am genuinely inspired by myself. I have my own inspirations. I can also say that I am fearless not in the same context of a dare-devil but I am someone who is not scared of trial by era. I get that its all about getting up and trying again until perfection. People spend lot of time calculating a formula for everything all while I have the endurance to run through every barrier life has to offer. I am the type who grows while growing. Knowing me and what I'm about will help to reveal what's so different about me. Maybe you can see from the outside but there's much more to uncover on the outside. Later though I know I will be able to owe my success to myself.

Day 20

2010-09-07T15:12:00.001-07:00

Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future

I can definitely see myself with Shola in the future there are so many parts of our relationship that can demand that conclusion. I give him kudos on the way he handles his life in general, before me. He seems to have everything in check and if not at his best he still finds a way to balance out his life perfectly. He's only able to take care of me because he can take care of himself. The way he treats his family and friends is nothing but loyal; even when they aren't doing their best to return the favor. He exercises loyalty to a full extent and I love that about him. I can trust him with my life and be very confident in knowing he's okay with that. Bottom line is he makes me happy and does everything in his power to keep me happy. Anyone like that is worth holding onto for dear life.

Day 19

2010-09-07T15:11:00.000-07:00

Nicknames you have; why do you have them

Actually my blog's name christielover was a name created by my boyfriend from a combination of my last and middle names.

Mabecka was a nickname given to me by anyone I have ever babysat and counseled. Even if they didn't know each other somehow I ended claiming it because they all used it

Becka, Becky, Backa are all nicknames given to me by default from friends and family

Xena was a nickname I had as a child. I was a wild one if not climbing something but ruining my legs and arms with scrapes and cuts. I had a leash as a child because of my wild ways. I really couldn't be tame. I was the tomboy that would ruin her princess dress in a hot second. Not only did I never stop moving, I was rough, and very much a brat.

Day 18

2010-09-07T15:10:00.000-07:00

Plans/dreams/goals you have

I have one too many. There are a few sub dreams/goals that I know will branch from my major ones. But first and foremost before anything I want to be a writer, not a journalist. In grade school everyone knew I wanted to be a writer it was a shock if you didn't. I would have my stories being passed around class and I would be attacked daily if I didn't write a new chapter or page. I just basically want to write what I want to write. I don't want to be conformed to one topic or area. Stories, poetry, creative writing, independent research, children's books, and plays.

To be able to teach young women what I was taught by my parents would be a blessing. That is definitely second on the list and my biggest dream. That is my end of the road, this is my life goal. I want to be able to lead as many women as possible. What my parents have taught me as a young girl I don't see it being taught in this day and age. For some reason being a lady is out of the question or just out of style. Actually being a girl has a new definition people are so determined to get away from "old school" morals they actually forget which ones are worth keeping. Like being a real lady not a "f$#@ing lady". I understand how it's became cool and okay to be promiscuous because it is very well excepted and almost expected. Theres a way you can mix it all up. Like you don't have to wear a mini skirt to be sexy but you don't have to wear a turtle neck either. I want to teach young girls that it's all about self respect because when you have that everything will fall into place. So whether you figure things out on your time or societies time as long as you have the right keys then you'll learn it all on the way.

I would love love to be an interior decorator I have always had a knack for fixing up ugly spaces. I mean small and dirty corners that seemed to have no potential. Give me an attic and it will look like a condo by the time I'm done with it. Now that I have gotten more into designing (publicly) I think it's something that almost needs to be added to my list of goals (its not necessarily a dream). I'm so vain and I need to take all the credit for everything I do. I don't see myself owning a store because I'm getting no help there would be no way I can keep up. But Make it Happen is officially apart of me and my goal for it is to only progress, grow, and be on popular demand.

Day 17

2010-09-07T15:08:00.000-07:00

Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why

I don't think I was brought into this world to walk in anyones shoes but mine. If I ever got a chance to I wouldn't take it. I've been living my own life I don't think I'd be able to handle anyone else's. Matter a fact I don't think I would want to.

A life behind scraps

2010-09-06T21:24:00.000-07:00

In one of my many notebooks I have a few of my life goals and plans, in detail. One of them are to own a library and a restaurant. I love to eat and I love to read so why not have both at my finger tips. One hobby that I hold very dear and take more serious then anyone would know is scrap booking. I would love to start some sort of company that models and designs personal scrapbooks. Maybe there is one already out there that I don't know about. I do know I want to have my own I'll use my fame (it'll get there trust me) to promote and make people recognize how important memories are. I have this philosophy on scrap books, that they can talk to you in a way people can't. Same thing with photo albums. There is something about a photo that can bring you to a place words and locations can't. I want people to see how important it is to be able to have your memories in your hand. It can do more then you know.

I never realized how serious I took it until I noticed how happy I was when I had new photos printed out. There was this time in my life where there was nothing looking up. I have never been so down, out, and miserable, it was so sad. At the time I was making a scrapbook of my life. It was one of the only things that kept a smile on my face and kept me going. lol I could only imagine how ridiculous I sound. But I truly am my happiest when I see that Joannes or Michaels is having a huge sale. I don't know what it is about stickers that were $3.99 that are now .99 cents that makes my heart full with joy. I really don't know what it is. I can be having the worst day ever but as soon as I see a sale of 2 scrapbooks for $9.00 I literally forget what happened.

If there was a chance for me to rob any store without getting caught I would go strait for the Kodak photo printers at CVS, no I don't want a mini. I want the huge one, I know it so well I've been using it for years. Don't give me the chance though I would love to own one of them. I remember at some point I was spending every dime I had on pictures, it was so ridiculous. We moved and there was a CVS within a 10 minute walking distance "What the hell am I waiting for", is what I thought. I mean every other day I was giving them a visit with $5.00, $1.27, and sometimes dimes and nickels (no actually a lot of times). And god forbid I waited a few weeks and accumulated over 50 photos from events, forget about it. I would find ways to print out doubles just because I knew over 50 pictures meant less cents a photo

Here you can see all my past posts about scrap booking and my love. This is actually one of those times where I haven't printed out photos in months. I have so many to sort through and a few empty scrapbooks to fill them up with. Along with the many new trimmings and stickers I got from Joann's that are just waiting for me to tear through them.

If you ever get the chance to look through a scrapbook I made it won't be funny as it may be reading about it. You'll not only understand more where I'm coming from but you will truly appreciate the art of scrap books.

Day 16

2010-09-04T19:38:00.000-07:00

Another picture of yourself

I was really really tired, one of the worst days I had last week. That sun was really kicking my butt.

Day 15

2010-09-03T08:11:00.001-07:00

Put your iPod on shuffle: First 10 songs that play

1. Nina Simone- Feeling Good

2. Choklate- Amazing

3. Lost Ones- Lauyren Hill

4. I should of cheated- Keyshia Cole

5. Me and my Imagination- Sophie Ellis

6. Roses- Outkast

7. Sucka for Love- Danity Kane

8. Do you- Ne-Yo

9. Final Hour- Vivian Green

10. Candy Rain- Soul For Real

Day 14

2010-09-03T08:10:00.001-07:00

A picture of you and your family

I wish I can put all pictures up but that would take up a few pages. I don't have one photo with ALL of us, someone is always missing. Here my 2 brothers J.G and Joseph are missing. From left to right;

Delilah, Elizabeth, Me, Daniel,Mary, and Magdaline. I love the fact that we all look exactly alike and harbor some of the same morals. But we are all so different, even with our faces we still manage to have our own structure. I think it's so crazy how that's possible, only god has that kind of power to make that happen. We are all similar but so very different. We agree on so many topics but still manage to have our own opinions. Even when it comes to agreeing to disagree we manage to make out friendly and stimulating debates from it. Its a beautiful thing having so many sisters and brothers, there will and always is someone to turn around to and catch you fall.

Houstina Summers.

2010-09-02T12:40:00.000-07:00

I discovered her lovely designs back on her Chictopia, designer of Cowgirl Heaven located in Los Angeles. Takes innovative accessories, casual dresses, and complicated tops to a whole another level. I was stunned at how she turned dresses upside down. I have never seen designs like hers before. Funky and futuristic her line is far more then impressive. She certainly has the eye.

Her accessories are to die for from her die hard scarfs, to her necklaces, and various belts. This women does it all.

Although her Esty shop is on vacation you can scan through her 444 sales to grasp what's so amazing about her clothes. She has something for every occasion, season, and women. You can grab a lovely neck warmer for the winter, a very cool top for a fashion show, or a beautiful dress for a wedding. I'm just so in love with her talent.

You can also check out her blog for updates

and email her at cooltina33@hotmail.com for inquires

Isn't She Fly!

Day 13

2010-09-02T06:26:00.000-07:00

A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

I can't say this person hurt me directly or intentionally. I'm not sure if they even know that I took their actions personal. I'm not one to write open/public letters. I usually would send it to an email but seeing as to how I don't want to call them. I'll use this as the perfect opportunity to address my feelings.

Dear, old friend (I really don't know what to call you)

If you knew how much you disappointed some of your friends then I don't think you would be where you are right now. If you knew how much you hurt us in the making of your very selfish decision/s then you probably wouldn't have moved. I'm also sure if you knew what we were calling you behind your back you may have stiffened up a bit quicker and got your shit together. You ruined a few relationships and it's going to take awhile for you to patch them all up. I hope it was worth it, moving across the country just to prove a point. I hope you're having the time of your life out there. Because what you ruined in the making between your indecisive decisions and very fickle behavior you not only lost points but you lost a lot of love. You didn't just break a few promises to one person but you did to a few. At one point I was really rooting for you to come back home but recently I have decided it's not the best thing to do. I wish you would make up your mind because we truly miss you. We miss the movie nights and comical dates. But I don't think right now is the best time for you to be making any major decisions. Its pretty obvious you can't think on your own terms and you need others to help guide you through harsh life changing decisions. What I don't think you understand is that you'll never be satisfied with the outcome you'll only end up changing your mind yet again. There is just too much talking in this situation, your either here or your not because you certainly can't be in both places. This is coming from a place of hurt but most importantly what I'm saying makes more sense then any other opinion you heard. Lay low for a minute your in no position to be in a relationship; bottom line. You don't need love right now or the company of friends and strangers who could really care less about your future. What you need to do is chill out and relax, don't come back to New York you might only make things worst. The only thing that will and can solve your problem is time. You need time to think and grow. If you continue to depend on others to guide you when you should be able to manage alone then you'll always bump heads with yourself and you will continue to be your worst enemy. You can't come back here looking forward to a better life plan you need a little more then a move and a girlfriend to get you through. Trust me that will never be enough because the problem has everything to do with you.

Maybe its new news to you that I care so much but I do. I wish you all the best in life and wish you good health.

If I can go

2010-09-01T21:43:00.002-07:00

Now Playing Usher-Dot Com over and over while blogging and surfing the internet.

I am so in love with these shoes right now, don't know what took me so long to get them. I know they are going to fit perfectly into my wardrobe. Along with these glasses I know I'm going to wear every chance I get.

Check my outfit I wore the other day along with my earrings which are for sale and up in my shop.

Buy them HERE

Day 12

2010-09-01T21:43:00.001-07:00

How you found out about Tumblr and why you made one

Her now Tumblr name is foxxworthy but she was the first tumblr I ever discovered, I found it on her Myspace. I loved hers all together. I love the porn and the free spirit of the blog. She was able to ask questions, I noticed forms and all lengthy posts. It was a modern day blog and I loved that.

Later I discover AllthingsAlishan and Bitchville (still one of my favorites). I loved the beautiful photography, the millions of photos of different foods. At first I followed a few cake blogs. I had so many photos to share I would get overwhelmed and post 50 photos a day, sharing of photos was the best part at the time. I slowly gained followers and followed a few here and there. Then I began to realize Tumblr is more then just sex, photos of kittens, and food. It was so much more you can do. I was fascinated with the free-spirit of the site and the fact that I can express myself whole heartedly (most of the time). It seemed like a site for me. I'll admit the site is not for everyone and wouldn't suggest anyone to join but so far I haven't regret it.

Trends?

2010-09-01T21:26:00.000-07:00

I have this philosophy when it comes to trends, well theres a way I approach them. For the most part if I see a new trend and I want to try it out then I will for sure. But there are some things that go against me. I can't stand the thought of bumping into someone who's outfit base looks just like mine. What I like to do is wait till a trend settles, sometimes its 6 months but if we're talking about N.y., a trend is milked for a few years. So subconsciously and on purpose I wait. I wait till I don't see it anymore, I wait till the stores stop selling it, and I wait till no one cares to practice it. Usually 3 to 4 years go by and before I know it I'm gravitating toward a trend I dreaded years ago. Here are a few trends I have went face forward with after they died out.

With this outfit I decided to trek back to the very ugly leg warmers. I remember how disgusting I thought they were. I remember how no one, I mean no one wore them right OR they just looked tacky as can be. I found a way to incorporate them in my outfit. A old women was selling them under a bridge for $4.00!!

I can't wait to it starts to get cold, because I got these when it was getting warmer so I never got a chance to wear the the way I wanted.

Like I said before there are some things that I don't think about I'll just wear it as I please. But back in 08' when this old trend had died out (it's still pumping now but not as much as it was when it first came out).

I decided to initiate into my wardrobe. I remember having a love/hate for the trend for it was done wrong but I seen it done right more often. The socks and heels, some will argue that I wore it terribly but it's not about them. I felt confident in the look and the way I portrayed it. Me feeling comfortable is all that mattered.

I was a glasses person before my niece broke every last one of my sunglasses then I fell off. Recently I found these. I remember there was a point where everyone suddenly had cataracts and needed reading glasses. Shortly after vintage glasses were really exposed. I mean I seen them worn with every and any kind of outfit, everyday. I seen different sizes, shapes, and colors and soon began to feel ill from the trend. They are so wonderful and they do actually go with every outfit, it's funny. Since I brought them I've been trying to figure out how I'm going to incorporate them into all my outfits.

So basically the trick to a trend is to let it settle for a few years maybe more. Most of the time it is milked so 4, 5 years might go by and you'll completely forget about it. But I'm telling you it feel so good to execute an old trend you it almost feels like you created it.

Day 11

2010-09-01T18:33:00.000-07:00

Another picture of you and your friends

Day 10

2010-08-30T17:42:00.000-07:00

Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

Florence and the machine- The dog days are over

This song makes me SO hype I mean I start dancing every time I hear it. I really love it. When I hear it on T.V I get even more excited. Its like, "you know this jam ,too". "Hell yeah let's dance".

01 Florence And The Machine - D...

No One Else-Total
This song definitely hits something for me. I love how it makes me feel. I'm not necessarily sad when I hear it
but if I was sad this would be the last song I listened to.

Total F Da Brat - No One Else...

Honey Honey- Feist
This song makes me feel so good. It makes me so happy. It relaxes me and puts me in a certain state of mind.

Feist - Honey Honey...

Lolippop- Lil Wayne/ Kanye West
I think I love Kanye West features more then his songs. It's the beat in the beginning and also the sound of
Beyonces voice
that makes me want to get up and dance. But because I love this song it makes me upset.
I can't stand Lil Wayne
I mean a lot.

Lil Wayne-lolipop Remix Ft Kany...

Vogue-Madonna
For some reason when I'm upset this song always comes on and it always makes me feel better. When
I'm in the process of trying to think of something else. This is the perfect song to play.
to get up and clean.

Madona - Vogue...

Phew!

2010-08-30T06:33:00.001-07:00

It's taken so long to get to 100 followers but since I'm here I'm so exited. It seem like it took forever I'm so eager to get to my next 100. But anyway because I am so thrilled I'm going to do another give away. Which will be very simple.

Today will be the starting date and it will end on September 12, Sunday where I will announce the winner.

You don't have to be following this blog
You must repost this photo (the earrings I'm giving away) onto your blog (tumblr, blogger, word press) it doesn't matter. With a link to this post informing everyone that I'm doing a give away.
After that you MUST come back to this post and leave a comment with a link to your post

I'm not sure who entered in my last give away because I never confirmed any one whether it was because I didn't see or I simply didn't know. So with this there should be no mistake. I want any and everyone to get a chance at winning a pair of my earrings. So here goes nothing :}